An 86-Year-Old UK Man Got Slapped With The Most Absurd Fine Of All-Time

If you thought the parking ticket you got for having a fraction of your front bumper in a "No Parking" zone was the most ridiculous fine ever levied, one 86-year-old fella from the United Kingdom would like a word.

He got slapped with a more than $300 fine for littering after he spat out a leaf that landed in his mouth.

Earlier this year, Roy Marsh was in Skegness, Lincolnshire, minding his own business when a leaf flew into his mouth.

"As I was sitting there, a gale blew a big reed into my mouth," Marsh said.

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Now, I don't know if that has ever happened to you, but it's enraging. Especially that fraction of a second when you're not sure if it's a leaf or a bug that just landed in your food hole.

So, Mr. Marsh did the only thing anyone does in that situation, which is to spit out the offending bit of tree debris. Which, I'd argue, is not only reflexive, but more environmentally friendly, seeing as the most common place to find leaves — not counting on trees — is on the ground.

Well, some nearby litter narc disagreed.

Maybe don't complain about a bogus parking ticket to the old English man who had to pay hundreds of dollars for spitting out a leaf that flew into his mouth.

"I spat it out and just as I got up to walk away, two guys [enforcement officers] came up to me," he said.

According to the BBC, East Lindsey District Council has enforcement teams who get out and look for litterers, which is great in theory. I hate litterers. Like, I don't want to see your spent flossers all over the parking lot when I'm walking into the grocery store.

Granted, that's probably not something you see much of the UK… just a hunch.

Anyway, this loser litter lackey decided to slap Marsh with a fine of £250.

The story started making the rounds after others were getting hit with ridiculous, over-the-top fines.

I mean, at this rate, people are going to start getting arrested for social media posts over there…

…what's that?

…oh, never mind…

Marsh argued this fine — as he should've — but only managed to get it down to £150, or around $200, which he paid, probably because he lived through nearly three-quarters of the 20th century and doesn't want to deal with that kind of nonsense.

Just ridiculous. Cut this guy a break.

You know what, I'm going to go stand outside and wait for a leaf to land in my mouth so I can spit it on the ground in solidarity.

There's no chance I'd get fined for that here in the US of A.

Say it with me?: USA! USA! USA!