Couch: Phil's Coming Out Party Worthy Of A Tiger Tale

Phil Mickelson hit a 9-iron safely onto the green, and there was no stopping it now. All day, you kept waiting and worrying, but Mickelson, hidden behind the shades and the slow, effected walk -- step. . .by. . .step -- wasn’t going to blow up now. He started walking toward the green for the final putts, his new destiny and, finally, a place in the golf world of his very own.

Phil would finally have something that Tiger doesn’t.

The fans, jumping and screaming, engulfed him. Someone tried to hug him or grab his head or something. Mickelson, the new 50-year-old golfing rock star in a dad bod, pulled away. For the first time ever, golf fans were out of control and Phil wasn’t. Security cops couldn’t hold them back, and Mickelson couldn’t get to the green. He finally did emerge with his awkward thumbs up and won the PGA Championship Sunday. 

He became the oldest player to win one of golf’s majors, the first one in his 50s. This might have been the greatest golfing win ever, maybe the best old-guy victory ever in any sport. Tom Brady, at 43, had people blocking for him. Phil didn’t, unless you count those security guards. The frenzied fans felt something new and different, and they lost control.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had an experience like that,’’ he said. “So thank you for that. Slightly unnerving, but exceptionally awesome.’’

Years ago, Tiger Woods walked up 18 at Cog Hill outside of Chicago, and the crowd broke through the ropes and charged up behind him. But then they stopped neatly a safe distance away and walked up behind him.

You can never tell Phil Mickelson’s story without the words Tiger and Woods. You wonder when Mickelson had to accept his world order. Even when Mickelson was a junior golfer and considered the next great thing, there was that younger kid named Tiger who was even better.

Mickelson would spend his whole career in Woods’ shadow. But on Sunday, Phil had his coming out party, at 50.

What does Phil now have that Tiger doesn’t? Yes, the record for winning while old. Tiger doesn’t have that. But also, this frenzied moment on the golf course. This was better than Woods’ win at the Masters two years ago. He was just a young kid then in his early 40s, afterall.

I couldn’t stop giggling every time they showed Phil on TV. Why was he walking like that? Why wasn’t he smiling? Why was he taking so long between shots? I mean, come on, Phil. Come on, Phil!

Were we not supposed to know who that masked man was? Back in his younger days, he looked like he was dressing up and acting like he was in the Blue Brothers movie, or maybe a Devo concert. Maybe just Men in Black.

No, I’m not going to blow up, not going to blow up, not going to blow up.

And his face? Zero expression. Zero. The Mickelson I remember was always smiling, with that pudgy baby face, even after he blew that U.S. Open years ago and said, “I’m an idiot.’’

Not to overstate things. Mickelson has already won five majors (Tiger has 15). He has won millions of dollars. He was already popular. He’s going to the Hall of Fame.

But Tiger had the frenzy. Tiger had the history, the youngest this, the greatest that, the first this.

When Phil started on tour, he couldn’t seem to win a major.

He arrived at one major and his wife, Amy, was home, nine months pregnant. Phil had a jet waiting nearby, fueled and ready to go, and played with a beeper. He said that if the beeper went off and Amy went into labor, he would drop everything and fly home to be with her.

He was actually criticized for that (Skip Bayless, for one) as it supposedly showed his lack of killer instinct.

The old-guy stuff is fun to have fun with. But it shouldn’t really be such a shocker. Brady won. The Chicago White Sox are in first place with Tony La Russa, who’s 76, as manager. Serena Williams will be a favorite at Wimbledon at 39.

Phil said he was slowing everything down before each shot and each step as a way to trick himself into keeping his focus. It’s a little scary to think that a 50-year-old can’t focus for four hours when we’ve had consecutive 70-something presidents.

Maybe when you’re 50 with millions of dollars, you just aren’t as hungry to grind your way to the top. But Mickelson put in the work, playing 36, 45 holes some days to make 18 seem easier. 

Sure, focus could have been a problem for Phil, but not because he’s old. Because he’s Phil. 

The course was set up ridiculously long to accommodate the amazing power of today’s young players. But as expressionless Elwood Blues said to Jake as they plotted to complete their mission from God: “It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.’’

“Hit it,’’ Jake said.

Phil hit the longest drive of the day, at 366 yards. He never wavered, and now has a feat and a moment no one has had before. This one is Phil’s and only Phil’s. Or whoever that masked man was.