Chanelle Punton Is Back For Summer, Lincoln Riley’s Brisket & ‘Cocks Fan Making A Scene

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Guys, I’m starting to freak out over how nice the weather has been around here

I don’t know how we’re going to be paid back for the incredible weather pattern we’ve been in here in northern Ohio, but it’ll probably mean multiple June/July weekend rainouts. I’m going to stay positive, but something wild is going on right now. We’re on an absolute heater right now with the great weather. Easter Sunday was 67, no wind, crystal-clear skies. Today it’s going to be in the low 70s, plenty of sun, maybe a pop-up shower. Tomorrow: upper 70s, sun. Wednesday: low 80s, sun.

This definitely shouldn’t be happening so soon and throws me for a loop, especially when it comes during Masters week. Typically I’m dreading Ohio weather right now only to be cheered up by the birds chirping at Augusta National and the azaleas looking amazing as usual. This year, the furnace won’t be on all week. It’s a miracle.

Now, as for the Masters itself, it’s unknown exactly how many fans will be allowed into the tournament. The club isn’t saying what they’ll let through the gates. That said, Golf Digest looked around town at available housing and found that there are plenty of options left for those lucky enough to find a badge. There won’t be some last-minute boycott like that unhinged lunatic Keith Olbermann spent his weekend pushing. Even Brooks Koepka, who had knee surgery less than three weeks ago, will be there as his hunt for the third leg of the career grand slam continues.

My week is pretty much set at this point: Cut the grass, feed the birds, blog, watch the national championship, play a round of golf, listen to Yacht Rock on the patio, show the tree guy which limbs need to be chopped off, fall asleep in the recliner to the birds chirping during the ESPN rebroadcast that goes until midnight.

• Good luck to tonight’s national championship game after that performance out of UCLA-Gonzaga. No pressure, Baylor. That said, I’ll be right there in the recliner locked in. I was talking to my 68-year-old father-in-law who is experiencing his first March Madness since retiring from a job that required him to be up at like 4 a.m. In the past, he’d miss games due to late tips (9:20 ET tonight), but not this year. Retirement sounds pretty incredible.

• Hummer’s set to start selling an electric vehicle that drives diagonally and sells for $110,000, in case you’ve been saving up the stimmy and $GME profits. Honestly, I’m going to wait until I figure out when I’d use the drive diagonally function.

• Speaking of $GME, the company has filed an offering. That’s tough news for the Reddit crowd, but they had to see it coming.

• Full disclosure: I watched multiple innings of last night’s White Sox-Angels game because Shohei Ohtani was pitching/hitting. I might not care about baseball like I used to, but I can respect a guy throwing 101 and smashing bombs.

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Masters

Written by Joe Kinsey

Joe Kinsey is the Senior Director of Content of OutKick and the editor of the Morning Screencaps column that examines a variety of stories taking place in real America.

Kinsey is also the founder of OutKick’s Thursday Night Mowing League, America’s largest virtual mowing league.

Kinsey graduated from University of Toledo.

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  3. Oh, the emotional rollercoasters one feels when scrolling through Morning Screencaps. If you’re a married man like myself, you start with the forbidden fruit of the IG models, making you yearn again for those days when you were single and on the prowl. Then, you’ve got the scenes from Chicago and Miami, reminding you of just how stupid that time in your life could truly be.

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