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Total21 It’s Tuesday, time for me to solve all of your life’s problems. But before we do that, let me remind you that you can now gamble in Tennessee — and Michigan and Virginia very soon too. So if you live in any of those three states plus New Jersey, Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Indiana, Illinois, More

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Written by Clay Travis

Clay Travis is an author, radio show host, lawyer, TV analyst, and the founder of OutKick (formerly known as Outkick the Coverage).
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  1. To the guy asking if he should ask for permission. DBAP. Absolutely ask. Whether the dad admits it or not, he will think a little less of you if you don’t. I had that talk about a year ago, most nervous I have ever been but glad I did.

  2. Clay, I think you opened the eyes to the real world of this college kid who was just trying to ask you if he should disobey his mom. You gave him 4 introspective questions that he probably never considered in his relationship with his parents. Yet, these are all very important to consider in this type of situation. You are like a modern-day Bill Cosby giving advice to a naïve Theo Huxtable wanting to buy a 100 dollar shirt.

  3. Definitely ask the father. Despite what the modern narrative says…marriage is still the transfer of authority of the father over his daughter to the soon to be husband’s authority over his wife. Getting the father’s blessing is key.

  4. The narrative that it is to old fashioned to do anything in today’s day and age is skewed. It is about showing respect to the father( family). I’m finding that in general the younger generations lack respect for older people. Maybe we need to stop giving everyone a participation ribbon.Ask the dad, it will go a long way to creating a relationship with him, which will help the relationship with your future wife. Respect is not “old fashioned”

  5. I don’t have a great relationship with my inlaws (married since 2006) and my relationship with them was much worse pre-engagement.

    But I still called and spoke with my future FIL before popping the question. However, I was afraid he may say no and I was still going to propose that night so instead of asking for his “permission” I asked for his “blessing.” It solved my problem because it didn’t really matter at that point what he said!

    But, I also think there is something to this approach given that we are in 2020 and dad’s really can’t stop the wedding. Asking for a blessing encourages the conversation, shows the respect, and keeps the tradition alive. I’m no woke-idiot and I wouldn’t be offended if a guy asked me for permission to marry my daughter, but I kind of like the blessing route.

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