Good luck today to all of you headed to a turkey shoot. You’re going to need it if sharpshooter Dania Jo Vizzi of Team USA Shooting shows up with her rifle looking to take home some prizes. I don’t care how much you’ve been practicing, she’s going to beat you. And she just might do the splits while blasting targets right in front of your face, just because she can.
Nicknamed “Shooterina,” this avid dancer now makes her best moves on the skeet ranges throughout the world,” her Team USA bio reads. “She recently qualified among thousands of applicants for the Juilliard Dance Intensive, arguably the world’s most renowned dance school in New York City, but declined the invite to focus on her shooting career. Became interested in the shooting sports after watching her dad shoot.”
That’s right. Dania will not only take all of the prizes at the shoot, but the world champion will dance on your grave in front of all your buddies who’ve had to hear how much you’ve been practicing for Thanksgiving 2020.
Get out there, hit some targets, enjoy the shoot, but please remember not to throw down money if this woman walks up and asks to have a shoot-off. You’re going to be miserable the rest of Thanksgiving Day. You’ve been warned.