Joe Kinsey
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Mamma mia!
Folks in New Jersey are wondering what in the Italian Old World is going on along a creek bed where hundreds of pounds of cooked spaghetti has been dumped by someone who is clearly a maniac. The mystery noodles recently started showing up in the woods along the creek in Old Bridge Township, New Jersey.
But why?
We’re talking huge piles of spaghetti and elbow noodles that just don’t make sense.
What started out as one woman’s mission to show neglect in her town has turned into a great mystery that has spread from her original Facebook post to Reddit where investigators say “We should send the perpetrators to the state penne tentiary,” and now to Twitter where millions of people have now taken notice of the great spaghetti dumping saga.
Nina Jochnowitz, who spotted the mess and called out the township, got results this week. She reports there was a “rapid cleanup” of the spaghetti. “As my friend called it, ‘Mission Impasteable,'” Nina quipped on Facebook.
That’s a great job by Nina looking out for her community, but we’re still left with the why to this story.
Why were 500 pounds of pasta dumped near a stream?
Let’s stop and think about this mystery for a minute. This is just a thinking-out-loud exercise.
- Why wouldn’t someone just dump the noodles into a trash can?
- This brings me to my next thinking-out-loud question: Was this done by someone who operates a food truck?
- A restaurant would just tell some $15/hr. high school kid to dump this into a trash can, right?
- But then I start thinking: Are there food trucks out there making spaghetti dinners? That seems like an anti-food truck meal.
- If this is from a food truck, the owner seems to overestimate his/her projected single-day sales goals.
- Is this some sort of trick just to see if someone can create a viral moment while snickering on a group text?
- Is this some sort of TikTok trend I’m not aware of?
- If it’s a ha-ha moment by teenage jokers, it seems like a ton of work. And heavy work getting all those noodles to that spot.
- Call me crazy, but it appears those elbows are lathered up in a red sauce.
- Was there some sort of spaghetti fundraiser meal where they didn’t know what to do with the leftovers and they figured the noodles would rot away and feed the earth?
- How was it determined the piles equaled 500 pounds? Let’s go to Reddit for one theory:
The noodles could’ve done great harm!
Jochnowitz, who found the noodle dumpage, says this behavior could’ve been bad for Mother Nature.
“You might say, ‘Who cares about pasta?’ But pasta has a PH level that will impact the water stream,” Jochnowitz told the Philadelphia Inquirer. “That water stream is important to clean up because it feeds into the town’s water supply … It was one of the fastest cleanups I’ve ever seen here”
The noodles might be gone, but the mystery remains.
Who and why need to be solved not so someone is fined or sent to the state prison on illegal dumping charges. We need to hear from whomever is responsible so they can answer the big one: Why?
Please step forward. I’ll even allow you to have your say anonymously. Why’d you do it? I’m not the Fed.
Email: joekinsey@gmail.com
