I know you live within walking distance of Vanderbilt University. Why don’t you walk your chubby ass over to practice, and let’s see if you can kick the ball 30 yards and jog to the sideline without needing oxygen?
Here’s your NFL Truths for Week 13:
10) There is a credible defense of Gregg Williams’ decision to all-out blitz the Las Vegas Raiders in the final seconds.
Of course, you saw the ending of the Raiders-Jets game. Leading by four points with 5 seconds to play and the Raiders needing 46 yards, Williams, New York’s defensive coordinator, sent eight defenders after Las Vegas quarterback Derek Carr.
Carr escaped the pass rush and hit receiver Henry Ruggs for the game-winning touchdown. The Jets fell to 0-12. Williams’ decision is being widely panned as one of the worst moves in NFL history. CBS’s Boomer Esiason insinuated the Jets threw the game to protect their No. 1 draft status. NBC’s Rodney Harrison suggested the same thing. Williams’ own defenders publicly questioned the play call.
It was a dumb decision. It likely guarantees that the Jets go 0-16.
But I know why Williams did it. On the play before Ruggs’ score, the Jets played Cover 3, with three safeties deep. Las Vegas receiver Nelson Agholor got behind all three safeties, and Derek Carr overthrew Agholor.
Williams was frustrated and pissed. He thought an all-out blitz would prevent Carr from having the time to wait for a receiver to get deep. Williams also didn’t expect Jets cornerback Lamar Jackson to bite on Ruggs’ fake of an underneath route.
Williams wasn’t trying to lose the game. Like a lot of coaches with huge egos, Williams was trying to be the hero from the sideline. He wanted to be the reason the Jets won the game.
Players win games on Sundays. Coaches win games in practice.
9) Cam Newton should back up Lamar Jackson in Baltimore next season.
Cam is painful to watch, even during a 45-0 rout of the Los Angeles Chargers. It’s not all Cam’s fault. Clearly, the Patriots lack the outside weapons for any quarterback to excel consistently.
But for two straight weeks, Cam has failed to throw for 100 yards. He completed 12 passes for 69 yards on Sunday. He’s now thrown five TDs and nine INTs for the season.
On the plus side, Cam has rushed for 11 TDs. He’s a wishbone quarterback. He’s the perfect backup for Lamar Jackson and Baltimore’s wishbone offense.
I don’t see any other fit for Cam across the league. I can’t see Bill Belichick bringing him back to New England. The NFL wishbone offense isn’t spreading. The shine is off Lamar and the Ravens. It’s Patrick Mahomes’ league. The wishbone is dead.
8) The 9-3 Cleveland Browns are the most overvalued team in football.
Cleveland has one impressive victory all season — a 32-23 victory over the Colts two months ago.
Cleveland almost had its second impressive victory on Sunday. The Browns trounced the Tennessee Titans for a half. Cleveland built a 38-7 halftime advantage. The Browns won the game by six points.
Despite a 9-3 record, the Browns have been outscored by more than 30 points twice this season. Their record is fat because they’ve beaten the Bengals twice, Washington, Dallas, Houston, Philadelphia and Jacksonville. That’s seven victories against six opponents with a combined record of 17-51-2.
I can see the Browns losing three of their last four games — Ravens, Giants, Jets and Steelers — and missing the playoffs.
7) The “Let Russ Cook” MVP campaign is cooked.
What happened to Russell Wilson and the Seattle offense? The Giants held the Seahawks to 12 points and dropped them to 8-4. In his last seven games, Russ has thrown eight interceptions.
Five weeks into the season, Seattle was undefeated and Wilson was the leading candidate to win MVP.
I’ve never been a big fan of Brian Schottenheimer as an offensive coordinator. He’s a run-first OC who has transitioned into a pass-first OC. I think that’s a difficult transition. It’s hard to sustain.
Patrick Mahomes and Aaron Rodgers are the two best quarterbacks in the NFL, and there’s distance between them and everyone else.
6) Let me apologize to Drew Brees for suggesting Taysom Hill might keep the New Orleans quarterback job.
Hill has done a nice job filling in for Brees. But it’s quite clear the Saints have the most upside with Brees under center and Hill occasionally coming off the bench for a specialty package of plays.
I have a bias against short quarterbacks, and it causes me to say stupid things about QBs under 6-foot-2. I apologize, Drew.
5) I remain completely unsold on Tiny Kyler Murray and his head coach Kliff Kingsbury.
Just a month ago, I tried to drink the Tiny Kyler Kool-Aid after he beat the Bills with an amazing throw to DeAndre Hopkins. I’m over it. Arizona lost its third straight game on Sunday. Tiny Kyler has been reduced to dinking and dunking. He’s the short Dak Prescott. Murray has thrown for 170 yards in back-to-back games.
At 6-6, Arizona could miss the playoffs. If the Cardinals lose next week to the Giants, winners of four straight, the experts will start to wonder about Kingsbury’s future.
Arizona was 5-10-1 a year ago. Kingsbury needs to win eight games this season to claim he has improved the Cardinals.
4) If I’m Carson Wentz, I want the Eagles to stick with Jalen Hurts the rest of the season.
If I’m Wentz, my goal is to make it to the offseason healthy and get out of Philly as soon as possible.
The Eagles justifiably benched Wentz on Sunday. He was ineffective against the Packers. It’s over for Wentz in Philly. He’s lucky COVID eliminated crowds in stadiums because the Philly fans would be booing him relentlessly.
The Eagles have had a three-year Super Bowl hangover. They backed into the playoffs in 2018 and 2019. Injuries and Super Bowl satisfaction have caused the organization to take major steps backwards.
If I’m Wentz, I have my eyes on San Francisco or Indianapolis.
3) The Colts and Texans combined to score 44 points in the first half and two in the second.
I watched this entire game. I had the Texans on the money line. I have no idea what happened. Houston’s J.J. Watt and Indy’s Justin Houston turned an offensive shootout into a defensive struggle. Watt had a sack and three tackles for loss. Houston recorded three sacks.
I’ve never seen anything like that game.
2) If the Dolphins finish the season 11-5, Brian Flores should be named co-Coach of the Year alongside Pittsburgh’s Mike Tomlin.
Even if the Steelers finish 16-0, I would be just as impressed with Flores if Miami finished 11-5.
Here’s Miami’s closing schedule: Chiefs, Patriots, at Raiders, at Bills. That’s as tough a finishing stretch as there is in the league. Miami would have to win three of those four games to finish 11-5.
It’s highly unlikely. The four opponents are a combined 32-15. It’s more likely the Dolphins lose all four. If that happens, I’d still have Flores as my No. 2 pick for Coach of the Year.
The Dolphins started last season 0-7. They were a laughingstock. Flores is 13-8 in his last 21 games.
1*) I like the Steelers and the Saints to make the Super Bowl because of their defenses.
Plus, I don’t want to jinx the Chiefs.
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