Videos by OutKick
I need your help!
And unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) your assistance is not required to remove the tape thong from Kanye West’s wife, Bianca Censori. If only someone had a disposal camera to capture that moment. Wait, someone does – Victor Wembanyama.
More on Victor’s throwback camera and Bianca’s likely painful undressing later.
Oh, and we’ll get to Titans schedule release girl in just a minute. She’s gone viral, and for good reason. Cheyanne Kraus is also likely going to be selling a bunch of homes soon, too. But again, we’ll get there. We just need to pace ourselves.
Now about that help:
My wife and I are car shopping and we need some advice. If you haven’t noticed, car prices (both new and used) seem to mirror the price tags on a mid-sized spaceship. Shit ain’t cheap! Someone’s gotta pay for all that ice cream Biden’s sucking down, right? Anyways, we’re likely going used. OutKick takes care of your guy, but I don’t yet have Clay money, so new is out of the question.
We’ve narrowed it down to a Ford Explorer or a Chevy Traverse.
Three rows are a must. We have two kids and though baseball is no longer in the cards (thank you Jesus!), we need room in the back for the essentials: football equipment, basketballs, numerous dance leotards/shoes and most importantly, and a YETI that refuses to store Bud Light.
Ideally, we don’t want to buy anything later than 2017/2018 and prefer leather seats (fancy, right?).
So hit me up with the pros and cons of each – firstname.lastname@example.org – and help me make this decision so my wife quits sending me screenshots of cars every hour on the hour. And better yet, if you live in northeast, Ohio or western, Pennsylvania and want to give your
first, second, third favorite Nightcaps writer a sweetheart of a deal, you know where to find me!
Titans Schedule Release Girl Cheyanne Kraus Might Be A Star
Now that we’ve talked buying, let’s talk selling. Cheyanne Kraus is a realtor in Ohio. She also went viral just over a week ago when she appeared in the Tennessee Titans’ awesome schedule release video. If you missed it, maybe slow down on the above mentioned beer-water-beer-water-beer-water-vodka-vodka-vodka-water pattern till the weekend.
Kraus is prominently featured in the Titans video that was recorded on Broadway in Nashville. When shown a picture of the Falcons logo and asked to name the team, she responds: “Red Stallions, rawr.” She was asked the same question when shown the Colts logo. Without missing a beat, Kraus answered: “Texas, that’s the Cowboys. Texas. Got that. Whooo!”
In addition to being entertaining as hell, she’s a damn smokeshow! Props to the Titans for unwrapping this gift. Cheyanne clearly has staying power. If my realtor looked like this, I’d definitely have overpaid. That says more about me than my realtor, but don’t worry about that. I’m just a guy trying to decide between a Chevy and a Ford.
And if the real estate market runs dry, she shouldn’t worry. Cheyanne and her husband have already capitalized on her viral video. They’re selling Red Stallions and RAWR merch online. That’s what we call Marketing 101 kids. Welcome to Nightcaps Cheyanne. I have a feeling we’ll be seeing you again!
Ouch! Kanye West’s Wife, Bianca, Has To Be Hurting
While Cheyanne clearly prefers a traditional bathing suit, Kanye’s wife, Bianca Censori, seems to favor less comfort when wearing a bathing suit. Or is it underwear? I don’t know. I have no idea. Anyways, Mrs. West, for some reason, chose to wear nothing but black body tape for a photo shoot earlier this week.
Photos of Bianca’s
Brazilian wax “fashion” were posted to the mowalola Instagram on Monday. Per the New York Post, Mowalola is a fashion brand spearheaded by Mowalola Ogunlesi, a former Yeezy employee.
The black tape covers all those hard-to-reach places and makes me wonder how incredibly painful the undressing process must’ve been. And that’s not the only question. Does one wear the tape more than once? Is the electrical tape hang-dry only? Do you wash in cold or warm water?
Lots of questions, not a lot of answers.
And oddly enough, we’ve seen this movie before. Bianca – armed with black tape – is not exactly a trend setter. During New York’s fashion week last fall, tape-only was all the rage amongst runway models.
Victor Wembanyama Has A Disposable Camera
I don’t know if tape thongs are making a comeback or ever were a thing (outside of NYC fashion week ’22), but I do know that disposable cameras used to be all the rage. Key words there being used to be. And now, they just might be making a comeback courtesy of soon-to-be San Antonio Spur Victor Wembanyama.
Moments after learning he’ll be making his NBA home in Texas, Wembanyama was shown snapping pictures alongside friends and family with a disposable camera.
I have to imagine that someone within his entourage ushered that disposable off to Walgreens just moments later. An hour after that, he was probably reliving those moments with a package full of 3x5s that included doubles.
Maybe once he’s stateside we’ll get a glimpse at the CD player inside of Victor Wembanyama’s ride.
Russian Cyclist Posts Naked Pic Following Crash
Too bad Victor and his disposable camera weren’t around for the first stage of cycling’s 4 Jours de Dunkirque. If he and his camera were, they’d have been able to capture quite the scene. Fortunately, somebody with a lens was around, though probably not the disposable variety.
Just before the stage’s finish earlier this week, rider Gleb Syritsa went crashing to the pavement. He walked away from the crash fine, but left quite a bit of skin behind. That was apparent in a photo of his injuries shared by the Daily Mail.
Luke Combs, Get That Man A Beer!
Our Russian cycling buddy looks like he needs some alcohol after that ride. Both the rubbing and drinking variety. And he’s probably not going to want to waste much time sipping those suds. My suggestion – shotgun that thing.
If you don’t know how, well, shame on you.
But don’t fret, country star Luke Combs recently gave Ed Sheeran a how-to when it comes to shotgunning. Grab a beer and follow along.
Good for our guy Ed. I bet after that beer he’s feeling Perfect. Let’s just hope it doesn’t lead to him forming any Bad Habits. Maybe I’m overthinking it. I don’t know. I’m just Thinking Out Loud.
Did you think Wednesday’s Nightcaps would feature a little Ed Sheeran wordplay? Me neither! But here we are.
For the record, in addition to slamming beers, these two occasionally collaborate together on stage. And it’s worth the watch/listen.
Something Fishy Going On Here
You know what else is worth watching? Of course not, that was rhetorical. Anyways, a dude was out on his boat in the middle of the water when he decided to start feeding fish to a flock of birds. Within seconds, a nearby seal caught wind of the seafood buffet and helped himself to the fisherman’s boat and his cooler.
If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that seal’s gotta be of Irish descent. The way he ate and left without exchanging pleasantries was the prototypical “Irish Goodbye.”
*Don’t try and cancel me. I’m a 1/4 Irish so I can freely discuss our love for alcohol, potatoes and not saying goodbye without repercussion.
Dog Days Of Summer
Let’s switch species and talk dogs for a minute. In last week’s Nightcaps, which I know you all read, saved and forwarded to friends and family, I talked about the Cleveland Browns’ contest that has fan designs being voted on for the team’s new secondary logo. That logo will be a dog. Or “dawg,” as long-suffering, completely-miserable Browns fans like myself refer to them as.
Anyways, upon stumbling across this, Nightcaps reader Harvey D. sent me a pic and a message about his very real hound, Lagertha, whom he feels should be front and center in any Cleveland mascot/logo discussions.
Per Harvey’s email: “…That is her personality in one picture. Chill as F, and will still growl at me when I walk across the house at a non approved(by her) hour.”
Looks like Harvey’s got a good one. Your move, Browns.
About To Close Up Shop
Alright, you know what time it is. Before I shotgun a few (more) beers and get weird with black tape and a disposable camera, I’ll leave you with the best of the rest. Thank me later!
*OutKick’s Nightcaps is a daily column that runs weekdays around 4pm EST.
Follow along on Twitter: @OhioAF
One CommentLeave a Reply
ok.. no shi#, the “woman on death row” made me LOL!