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I made a major life decision this week

I let my wife fill up the Battery Daddy that was supposed to be my Christmas gift.

Look, you read that headline and probably thought I finally cut AT&T UVerse out of my life once and for all. Yes, cable is officially gone from our house, but that’s not even close to the biggest moment of the week around here.

Monday, after lunch, I finally sat down to fill the Battery Daddy that had been resting under the tree (it’s still up because grandma won’t be here for another week). There was a whole process where I gathered up all the packs of batteries I’d purchased at Costco and sat down at the kitchen table to begin the organizational process.

I wasn’t a dozen batteries deep and here came Mrs. Screencaps to watch.

It was immediately clear she wanted in. I could see her brain churning. I had one battery turned the wrong way and she just stared at me.

Here, you fill it up.

No, it’s yours.

Seriously, you fill it up, I’ll go find more batteries.

I know what some of you are thinking — #DBAP, you pussy!

Guys, let’s back up the slander train for a minute to think about how things went down when Mrs. Screencaps hooked up the PS5 I bought for her. The first 12 hours of the PS5’s life in this house were spent playing PGA Tour 2k23.

You’re out of your damn mind if you think Mrs. Screencaps wanted to see golf on her beautiful new PS5.

But she understood I needed that moment. She needed her moment with the Battery Daddy.

That’s marriage, right? Give and take?

Quick hitters:

  1. Will it take 10 years before the Bob Evans franchise is gone? I’ve been keeping an eye on that franchise and it’s becoming clearer by the day that it might not survive 10 years.
  2. Now I’m seeing people saying Skip Bayless wasn’t out of bounds for his Monday night tweet about the Damar Hamlin situation. Never forget that the mobs always need a villain. Skip filled that role this week.
  3. What’s the worst remodeling decision you ever made?
  4. Is barn wood out in remodeling projects?
  5. What’s ‘in’ for remodeling projects?
  6. What’s the one must-have for guys in 2023?
  7. Sports betting went live in Ohio Sunday morning and it doesn’t interest me in the least. 20 years ago would’ve been a different story. I’m very happy with this version of myself.
  8. Cutting cable — went to YouTubeTV — means I won’t have to suffer through Cincinnati Reds baseball this spring and summer. That’s a big relief.
  9. We don’t need a new version of “Night Court.”
  10. I saw a discussion on expanding March Madness to something like 96 teams. GTFO. Leave your grimy hands off the tournament.
  11. My youngest son turns 6 today. He’s our jokester. The 10-year-old is super serious. The 6-year-old likes a good fart joke and is definitely going to be the life of the party.

Let’s check in with Indy Daryl

• Indy Daryl has been a huge thought leader around here for what feels like two years and I like to give his emails the proper respect, so that means he leads us off this morning.

Happy New year! As I sit here on the eve of 2023 (admittedly a couple Manhattans deep) watching the CFP (OSU is up 35-24!!) I can’t help but think of the community you have created. There is no way I would have expected to read about vacations across Europe, federal prison TV, reports from southwest pilots, meat smoking, and everything in between in one stinking column. It is simply incredible!

Thank you for all you do. You bring such a diverse community together. Truly amazing to read all the contributions from all the readers across this great country.

Want to specifically call out SWA employees who were able to procure my older sister’s luggage and car seats from the bowels of the Austin airport. They (sister, brother-in-law, 3 girls) were stranded after having checked in and being told 15 minutes before their flight that the flight was canceled!! Thank you for making Christmas possible for our extended family by getting that luggage which was initially stated as ungettable!

All that to say you are amazing! Have a great night and go OSU!

Crosby, ND is thinking about Damar Hamlin

• Dillon L. knows all too well about scary situations on the football field. I’ll let him explain.

Hey Joe, just a few thoughts today.

The Hamlin situation was unreal scary and brought back many emotions from earlier this year. We actually had a HS football player on our team collapse from cardiac arrest this year almost exactly like Hamlin did. Luckily he made a full recovery and ended up actually PLAYING for us the last few weeks of the season after the incident.

https://www.kfyrtv.com/2022/09/29/grace-gridiron-divide-county-football-player-tells-story-cardiac-arrest-recovery/

(Yet another example why the people of North Dakota might be the toughest out there.)

It was the single scariest thing I have ever seen not just as a coach but as a human. The only positive that can come out of things like this is how people react to tragedy, we saw it first-hand here how people can come together as it seems they are doing right now.

It is unreal to see that his charity is over 3 million and people can actually get along for once and rally behind each other. I’m sure you’ve received a ton of emails on the subject so I apologize for adding one more. Thoughts and prayers for the young man as well as teammates/loved ones etc. 

Big Ten fan fights back

• J Shep. would like a word with those who are bashing the Big Ten:

Love your guy who said the Big 10 has “two, three good teams and the rest suck.” lol

Nine teams in bowls, record of 5-4, with the 2 teams playing in the National Championship Playoffs each losing in one-possession games. 

The only team I felt sorry for was an overmatched Purdue team in Citrus Bowl – they should have never been there.

The only fan base I felt sorry for was Iowa’s – anyone who had to watch that offense all year deserves some sort of compensation.

Kinsey:

That was Notre Dame fan Scott W. taking a shot at the Big Ten after a 1-2 December 31 and a 1-2 Jan. 2.

How would you use this TV in your life?

Any law enforcement experts reading Screencaps this morning?

Is it plausible this was a scheduled stop by the feds as the Idaho murder suspect made his way across the U.S. from Washington to Pennsylvania? It’s been reported that Bryan Kohberger was pulled over twice on December 15 and those stops were made nine minutes apart.

Just a coincidence?

Were the feds looking for intel out of those stops?

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com


And with that, let’s get rolling.

I know you’re still struggling to get back into a routine. Same here. I get it. Try to give 110% and regroup later this evening.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

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Written by Joe Kinsey

I'm an Ohio guy, born in Dayton, who roots for Ohio State and can handle you guys destroying the Buckeyes, Urban Meyer and everything associated with Columbus.

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