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The Twitter corporate surplus auction is here and it’s your chance to get a piece of the old Twitter headquarters before Elon Musk walked in and gutted the place.
The auction consists of unnecessary items like office furniture, multiple espresso machines, kitchen equipment, sit-stand desks, and Kegerators.
This isn’t one of the more exciting auctions you’ll ever see. Outside of a blue Twitter bird statue and an ‘@’ sculpture planter, this auction won’t have much value for the collectors out there.
The auction, conducted by Heritage Global Partners, begins January 17 and will last a day before the items are sent packing to new homes. Keep in mind that buyers are responsible for removing the items and shipping. Don’t cry about shipping prices if you go home with the blue Twitter bird and shipping costs are $1,000 to get that bird to your Indiana farmhouse.
Must-buys: A blue Twitter bird statue
Don’t waste your money spending $8 a month on a blue checkmark. Buy this 46″W x 41″H x 12″D Twitter logo bird and brag about your purchase like Darren Rovell bragging about his MLK autograph collection.
(2) Rock the Bike Fender Pro Recharge Stations
Recharge your phone like a woke Twitter engineer with one of these recharge bikes. But remember, this auction is for TWO BIKES, so you and a fellow woke can recharge and get some exercise at the same time. Save the environment and get a full charge at the same time. Then go brag about it to your fellow lib libs who haven’t left Twitter.
Save the earth with this planter that will have guests talking at your next woke cocktail party.
Manitowoc ice machine
There’s a very good chance this is a pellet Chick fil A ice machine that would be the talk of the neighborhood if you unleashed this bad boy during a suburban house party. Those suburban house wives love that Chick fil A ice.