The NHLPA Just Put Out What Is Quite Possibly The Most Boring Player Poll Ever

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I’m a sucker for a good player poll. In this case, the word “sucker” is apropos because I was roped into reading through, quite possibly the dullest player poll ever.

Just a couple of weeks, ago the NFLPA did a players poll, and it gave us some juicy tidbits. For instance, it allowed players to put some teams on blast for sub-par working conditions. I figured it was the NHL’s chance to get the people talking. Maybe they’d bash Madison Square Garden for having the worst ice surface. Perhaps some players would point to a fanbase they think is the worst. I figured we could even get lucky and one player would get called out as the dirtiest in the league.

No, nope, and heeeeeeellll naw.

Instead, we got the safest, most boring, poll I’ve ever read. At the worst of times, it bordered on nonsensical.

The On-Ice Questions Were Dull And Predictable

There were some standard fair questions that players answered about on-ice topics. The goalie or player you want in a must-win game for instance.

Andrei Vasilevskiy and. Connor McDavid won those categories while Sidney Crosby and Aleksander Barkov were named “most complete” and “most underrated” players respectively.

Of the on-ice categories the most interesting was “player you hate playing against, but would love to have on your team.” While an interesting question, this one yielded a predictable winner: Brad Marchand.

Then of course, there was the shoe-horned in “which female player would you most like to play with” because you’ve got to get that progressive street cred at every turn.

Although, if we’re being honest, Marie-Philip Poulin and Hllary Knight are tough to argue,

One of the big things that bugged me about this list was that it was all positive. No “worst” anything. Instead of the worst ice surface, we only had the best ice surface, which went to Montreal’s Bell Centre.

I hoped that the off-ice awards would make things interesting… but alas, they did not do that.

Player Poll Revealed That Pro Athletes In Their 20s And 30s Enjoy Vegas

The “off-ice” questions — of which there were a whopping three — were just as boring as the on-ice questions. If not more so (if you can believe that).

Like this one: what is the best city in which to have a day off?

Let’s see… where would a bunch of young millionaires enjoy themselves the most. Hm… I’m gonna guess… Columbus.

Dammit, I was so close.

Now it’s time for the category we’ve all been waiting for: player with the best shoes.

No. I’m serious. Why ask about their least favorite cities, teams, or fanbases when we can ask who buys cool shoes?

Well, the winner was Auston Matthews.

Then came the category that bugged me more than any other: Best locker room guy.

Why did this one bother me? Because players can only pick someone they’ve played with, that means that tons of names were getting thrown into this category.

The winner — with a whopping 3.8% of the vote (there were 384 votes cast for this question) — is Marc-Andre Fleury.

3.8% was the winning percentage of the vote? Isn’t that within the margin of error or something (I barely got through high school statistics).

Hopefully, when the NHLPA does this again, they start asking some decent questions. Ones that allow players to give honest answers and maybe shine a light on potential issues the way the NFLPA did.

Follow on Twitter: @Matt_Reigle

Written by Matt Reigle

Matt is a University of Central Florida graduate and a long-suffering Philadelphia Flyers fan living in Orlando, Florida. He can usually be heard playing guitar, shoe-horning obscure quotes from The Simpsons into conversations, or giving dissertations to captive audiences on why Iron Maiden is the greatest band of all time.

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