Taylor Beth Davis Gets MLB Call Up, My Wife Didn’t Bite On April Fool’s & MLB Is BACK!

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Happy Opening Day to baseball fans around the world, especially those who are about to freeze

It wouldn’t be Opening Day here in Ohio without weather being an issue. Normally it’s rain in Cincinnati and snow in Detroit. The good news is that precipitation shouldn’t be an issue here as it’s a sunny morning and a crisp 28 degrees. The high should get to 34 in Detroit where 8,200 fans will be allowed in by Lord Whitmer. The Reds are expecting around 12,600 to file through the gates as baseball begins its march back from COVID destruction.

Normally the big Opening Day news in Cincinnati is rain, wind and clouds. Fans were greeted this morning with a dusting of snow, but it’ll get to 41 for the 4:10 first pitch. Good luck to those who are still around for the final out.

Here’s the silver lining to freezing your ass off at the park today: baseball is actually back. Yes, I’ll lose interest in a week. No, I won’t sit through random 9 inning games for the love of the game. Yes, I’ll throw on a game on a blazing hot July night to help me fall asleep while sucking down some air conditioning. I’m rough on baseball, but the fact remains that the sport allows us the opportunity to pay huge amounts of money to sit at a ballpark and forget about the struggles of life. Nothing takes away the pain of horrible jobs, failing marriages, in-laws driving you nuts like crushing $12 draft beers, $5 hot dogs, and $10 personal pizzas on a bright sunny day at the park.

Even with all of its warts, and there are hundreds, a day at the park remains an event we can always depend on to brighten the mood just by gazing at the green grass and listening to the beer vendor yelling out, “Who needs one?” I’m getting chills just thinking about it.

โ€ข I heard something that took me back a few decades last night while listening to the Steve Gorman Radio Show on the local classic rock channel. Steve took a song request. It hit me like a brick wall. A freakin’ song request! “Hey Steve, I was wondering if you could play some Guns N’ Roses ‘Paradise City,'” the caller said like it was March 1988.

Gorman responds, “Right on. I think we’ve got that one,” as if he had the cassette ready to throw into his tape deck. I had to pinch myself to make sure I wasn’t driving around in a Back To The Future DeLorean.

You’re damn right I cranked the volume on my wife’s Chrysler minivan while pulling into Panera to grab some drinks.

โ€ข Speaking of old memories, do you remember the last time you stood in line for concert tickets? I’m thinking it was the Hara Arena lobby in 1993 for Nirvana tickets. I ended up selling my pair to make a few bucks and Kurt was dead by April 5, 1994. Lesson learned. I was young and dumb.

โ€ข Google is bringing workers back to company offices and telling those who want to work from home there will be hurdles. Uh oh, those of you who got comfortable not wearing pants could be in for a big wake-up call.

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Written by Joe Kinsey

Joe Kinsey is the Senior Director of Content of OutKick and the editor of the Morning Screencaps column that examines a variety of stories taking place in real America.

Kinsey is also the founder of OutKickโ€™s Thursday Night Mowing League, Americaโ€™s largest virtual mowing league.

Kinsey graduated from University of Toledo.

11 Comments

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  1. with all the instagram models covering sports like Brent Musberger once did, who are these leagues trying to appeal to more? frustrated married men? lesbians?

    โ€˜honey, can you tivo the pregame show with marrisa thompson? i hear she looks hot today. Bob calledโ€™ ๐Ÿ˜œ

  2. Had tickets to see Elvis New Years eve 76-77. Sold those to go to BTO at a dinner theater. Lesson Learned. The King never did another New Years Eve Concert. BTO? Got to “Take care of Business” with them multiple times after that.

  3. If you have kids and aren’t rocking the minivan, get a clue. Family bought a Chrysler Pacifica two years ago, and haven’t looked back. Stow-and-go middle and back row? Game changer. Hauled a bunch of lumber to make a kick-ass sandbox in the backyard. Thing can handle 4×8 sheets of plywood like a champ, 1200lbs of sand like it was nothing. It’s a sweet ride, Joe.

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