Stouffer’s Mac On Tap Should Be A Thing

Imagine for a second it’s 2:30 a.m., corona’s not a thing, and you’re plowed after a wild night of crushing Red Bull vodkas and hitting a dozen bars. You know Taco Bell is a terrible idea and McDonald’s is better at noon when you’re waking up hungover. Ahh, but then your foggy brain remembers there’s a Stouffer’s Mac on Tap sitting on the counter of your condo kitchen with a piping hot batch of mac & cheese just waiting to be devoured.

Stick with me here. You get thrown out of the Uber, get to your feet, bounce off a Japanese maple tree in front of your beautifully landscaped condo, somehow unlock the front door and head straight for the Mac on Tap. Bowl? No, you treat that mac tap like you’re 19 and upside down on a keg barrel. Mouth wide open just inhaling that liquid gold and those perfectly cooked noodles.

No peeling back corners on frozen boxes. No microwaves. This would be the moment in your life where you knew all those long hours were worth it. Here you are on a Saturday night/Sunday morning crushing carbs, not giving AF about that Keto diet you used to be on. Just living life to the fullest on Mac on Tap mouthful at a time.

Let’s get these into production, Stouffer’s.

Even if the drunken slob category doesn’t sound like a smart business play for you guys, there’s always the suburban housewife play where you go after the mom’s who serve this stuff 4-5 days a week because that’s all little Bailey will eat.

This is a goldmine waiting to happen during troubled times when people can’t afford to go out and drop $10 on Panera’s liquid gold. Think about it Stoffer’s.

Before I forget, think I’ll make one of these for July 4 weekend. A beer faucet of high enough quality to stick into a watermelon will run you $25 or so.

Written by Joe Kinsey

I'm an Ohio guy, born in Dayton, who roots for Ohio State and can handle you guys destroying the Buckeyes, Urban Meyer and everything associated with Columbus.

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