Sofia Vergara Steals The Show, Jessica Biel Birthday Love, Murdaugh & OJ, McConaughey Plane Video, Horny China iPhone

It's Friday, and we have such a mixed bag of Nightcaps drinks I don't even know where to begin. Somehow, I'm going to pour a little Sofia Vergara, Jessica Biel, Alex Murdaugh and Matthew McConaughey in a mixer, shake it up, and hope she doesn't burn too much on the way down.

And if it does, so what? You're gonna get a good buzz regardless, and isn't that why we're all here?

Along the way we'll revisit my Robin Williams list from yesterday with a reader email I'm still trying to wrap my head around, talk about the horniest iPhone accessory yet, and celebrate national women's month in the only way we can in 2023.

All right, enough stalling. Let's be like Camila Alves McConaughey's plane and plunge right into Nightcaps!

Camila Alves McConaughey shows while I'll never fly again

Nothing like starting your Friday with a terrifying plane story that'll make you never wanna fly again!

Full disclosure: I am terrified of flying. Hate it. I do it occasionally because I have to, but I despise every single second of it. Give me Amtrak over Delta any day of the week and twice on Sundays.

Oh, you think I'm being dramatic? Camila, you alright, alright, alright with flying?

Nope. No thank you. If and when my plane landed after that, I promise you I would never fly again. Absolutely zero percent chance of it. I'd walk home before even entertaining the idea of getting back on a plane.

There ain't enough Copenhagen wintergreen and $9 Jack Daniels nips in the world to get me through another flight.

PS: Looking for some underrated plane movies this weekend? Flight, with Denzel Washington, Sully, with Tom Hanks, and Non-Stop, with Liam Neeson are all worth your time.

The last 30 minutes of the Liam Neeson one are so outrageously unrealistic you won't be able to look away.

Anyway, it all looked miserable and terrifying and I'm just happy that eagle landed. We certainly did NOT need that sort of bad news to start our weekend.

Sofia Vergara brings her talents to Carol Burnett's birthday

OK, let's lighten the mood a bit. It is Friday, after all.

It's a HUGE few weeks for birthdays. Jessica Biel turns 41 today as you'll see in a bit, Julie Bowen turns 53 (as you'll also see in bit), and Carol Burnett turns 90 next month.

Admittedly, the Carol Burnett Show was so far ahead of my time it ain't even worth trying to lie and say I watched it. Obviously I didn't, because I'm pretty sure my parents were still in high school during it's run.

That being said, I found myself in a wormhole this morning and I'm glad I did. As dad would say, this is when comedy was good.

Anyway, Burnett threw a banger birthday bash last night, and the stars were out in full force. Not surprisingly, Sofia Vergara stole the show because of course she did.

I swear, this woman just doesn't age. It's stunning, really. I don't get it.

It's unreal.

Fun fact: guess who went to college with Sofia Vergara's son? Yep. Yours truly. And nope, we most certainly did not run in the same circles.

Anyway, I tie all of this together by saying Modern Family is one of the better shows of all time, still holds up today, and the Julie Bowen/Sofia Vergara duo was unstoppable on network TV for 11 years.

And I'm also man enough to admit I tear up at the end of almost every episode, especially when Ed O'Neil does the voiceovers. Make fun of me all you want, I don't care.

If you need something to pass the time this weekend, Modern Family (Hulu) ain't a bad way to go. The last few seasons are kinda garbage, but this scene is still hilarious.

Murdaugh Mania sweeps the nation

Boy, this was a wild ride, huh?

I can remember a few high-profile cases in my lifetime that just gripped the nation, and this one certainly qualifies.

The OJ trial of course tops the list, but there are a few others, too. The Scott Peterson trial back in the mid-2000s was a big one, I still remember where I was when the Casey Anthony verdict came in, and the George Zimmerman one was certainly a lightning rod.

This Murdaugh one was a biggie considering it took place during the social media/Netflix era, and the jury didn't really leave much doubt, did they? That sucker was OVER before I could even finish The Irishman!

OutKick touched on it yesterday, but OJ Simpson piping in with his thoughts was laugh out loud funny.

"I don't know why they think I'm an expert on this" was maybe the greatest line in social media history.

OJ is messing with us, right? Has to be. At this point, you have to respect it, too. Wish he would've given us a wink right when he said it.

Imagine what someone would have said if you told them back in 1995 during the OJ trial that he'd be giving out unsolicited murder advise on something called Twitter in 30 years.

What a world.

Speaking of: here's Sheryl Crowe making bang bang shrimp and discussing the murder trial before we move on.

Jessica Biel deserves more love

OK, I know it's a Friday and we have to start getting ready for a night of shenanigans (or Modern Family!), so I'll be quick (probably not, though).

Happy birthday, Jessica Biel! Our girl turns 41 today, and I'm gonna be honest with you, she deserves more love.

Jessica Biel was a heartthrob during my childhood, and she's aged like fine wine. I'm pretty sure my first introduction to her was in I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry - the annual Kevin James-Adam Sandler movie - and let me tell you, she opened my eyes.

Jessica Biel has some bangers, by the way. Yes, I know she's very popular in a terrible movie called Powder Blue, but I'll let you guys look that one up since we have to have some boundaries here.

Summer Catch with Freddie Prinze Jr. is a good one, too, along with the 2003 Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake. Yes, she was in 7th Heaven, too. Wasn't my cup of tea, but people love that show, and I give respect where it's due.

She was also a horny wedding crasher in an episode of New Girl, too, which is another great one to start watching.

I should really start charging for these suggestions, because they're gold.

Horny China iPhone and Jeopardy! nerds

Time to empty the tank as barrel toward the finish line. As my terrible college baseball coach used to say as we trailed by 15 runs after 3 innings, 'leave it all out on the field!'

Single & ready to mingle but don't want to interact with an actual human? The folks over in communist China have you covered with their brand new iPhone kissing plug-in!

Yeah, that won't get super weird, really, really quick. And ya'll know exactly what I'm talking about. So dumb.

Speaking of dumb ... take it away, Hayley!

Only one guy can save us after that. Robin Williams!

Guy just had fun and made people laugh for decades. I gave you the definitive list of Top 5 Robin Williams movies in yesterday's Nightcaps, and reader Clint weighed in late last night:

I would say Robin Williams best movies are 'The Survivors' with Walter Matthau and Jerry Reed and 'Club Paradise' with Peter O'Toole and Rick Moranis. Great and entertaining shows, all with Robin Williams.  

Those movies outdate me by about 10 years, but I'm also willing to give 'em a try. Is Clint right on this? Let me know, because if so, I'm IN.

OK, that's all I have for today.

Let's all go out and have ourselves a Friday night, and do our best to be smarter than these Jeopardy! nerds who went 0 for 5 ("and that's baseball!") on sports questions last night.

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).

Wanna try and tell me how much safer flying is than driving even though I'll never believe you? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.