If you’re in your mid-30s like me, then catching a glimpse of Salma Hayek naked in 1995’s Desperado was a seminal moment of your childhood.
The younger generations truly will just never understand how much harder it was to get eyes on naked chicks before the internet. Sure, the early, grainy, a/s/l version of the net existed in the 90s, but nothing was streamlined or accessible like it is now. Basically, your only options for early manhood were a pervy older brother, a long-forgotten Playboy in the garage, some scrambled moaning on an explicit cable channel, or an up-and-coming starlet making her way in Hollywood.
Truly, your best bet was watching a few minutes of an R-rated VHS with Mom and Dad before they knew which parts to fast-forward through. And if Dad didn’t have his finger on the trigger with Desperado playing, Salma made him pay.
Hayek always been the type of star who dripped sex appeal whether her clothes were on or off, and that’s what really makes her stand apart as a young man’s fantasy. You could catch her in her prime in an edited-for-TV showing of From Dusk Till Dawn and immediately realize that something greater than G.I. Joes awaited you in adulthood.
Hayek will be 55 this year, so to be able to say that she is still a sex symbol is incredible, and a real testament to her staying power in Hollywood. Thanks to over thirty years in the biz at this point, lusting after the voluptuous Hayek has undoubtedly become a multi-generational affair for fathers and sons. Sports fandom, lawn care, tying a neck tie, learning to drive, staring at Salma Hayek’s chest; some things are just better as a family.
And Hayek would agree, noting that her famous assets have continued to steadily grow throughout her career. “A lot of people said that I had a breast augmentation,” she recently said. “I don’t blame them! My boobs were smaller! So was the rest of my body.” Hayek went on to explain that basically every major feminine milestone—pregnancy, breastfeeding, and even menopause—caused her breasts to keep growing. That’s called hitting for the cup size cycle, and to celebrate the achievement, Hayek will be getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
With a body like that, who needs handprints in the cement?
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