Olivia Culpo Invades Jackson Hole, Clay & Buck With Trump, Hutton Doing Deals, Plus Will Clark Still Has It

What was I supposed to do when my 5-year-old asked if we could go get a donut?

Here I am on a Wednesday morning at the Screencaps command center strategically placed in the house so I can keep an eye on the TV, the kitchen, the eat-in kitchen, the front door, the back door, and the back yard, just minding my own business and working away on this post, when my 5-year-old son strolls into the room and asks a question in the sweetest way possible.

“Dad, can we go get a donut, please?”

My resistance powers were useless. So there I was breaking my normal work routine — I’d say I’ve gone 800 editions of Screencaps without breaking that routine — at 7:20 a.m. and going on a donut run.

What’s the purpose of this little nugget? I guess it was to remind myself that sometimes there are things more important than 25 extra minutes searching through the perfect food photos to feature in Screencaps. Or going through my Twitter lists looking to see what drug busts the feds made Tuesday.

It’s also a reminder that throwing a wrench in the workday isn’t always a bad thing. It keeps things fresh and evolving. I have to remember that I’m a content guy and that means I have to get out into the world to see how people are living. I have to see the creativity. I have to see the….HOLY CRAP DID A HIGH SCHOOL GIRL JUST GET OUT OF THAT $25K FORD F-150 IN THE DUNKIN’ PARKING LOT?!?

That’s right, I’m pulling out of Dunkin’ and I spot a truck that would create a vicious bidding war on Bring A Trailer where these pickup trucks are going for insane money.

Look at the prices they’re bringing.

This truck is a straight-up unicorn in Ohio. I don’t see any rust! Now I know many of you hate Fords and will tell me all about your Dodge RAMS, but let’s all just pump the brakes and appreciate that this truck even exists in Ohio and that the bed hasn’t completely rusted out.

And if I’m the high school girl driving this truck, I’d have to think long and hard about selling it, taking the profits and starting a retirement fund, and spending a few bucks on a beater.

• Conversation topic this morning on my group text exchange: The crazy people on Facebook who have never seen an item they’re not willing to buy.

My buddy writes:

I posted my kids’ shitty bunk beds on marketplace last night. Woke up to 15 messages from people wanting it. Is there a bunkbed shortage goin on?

####

Would someone out there please help me understand the Facebook Marketplace buyer mindset? My buddy says they bought it a few years ago for $250 and he put $100 on it last night, only to kick himself this morning for not asking for $250 and settling for $200.

Does it feel like people buy on FB Marketplace because they’re bored and they don’t want someone else to get a deal over them? Are there just that many buyers looking for bunk beds and $5 stacks of used clothes?

Help me out on this phenomenon.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

How to break golf ties for Jacob S.

• Reid S. writes:

There are many ways in breaking a tie in golf. The obvious and best answer is the US Open style. 18 MORE HOLES!! Better load up on more of them Busch Lattes! You can plan this for the following week or just next time there is good weather if it is too late in the day to get back out there or if you are like me & fear for your life telling your wife you need another 5 hours to settle this bet, but regardless Let the Bet Ride until another day BABYYYY!

Heck, double that bet up as a carry-over like you would in a skins game. Just choose someone half responsible to hold onto that cash until the next time! And please use cash, getting a Venmo transfer after taking down a group of friends is not quite as fulfilling as being handed a stack of good ole $5 & $10 dollar bills you can hide from the wife.

More boring ways to settle if you can’t get back on the course. (in order from least boring to most boring) A chip off! Give everyone a chip and award the closest ball to the hole, or better yet, say that the worst chip is the loser (talk about pressure!). Same with a putt-off. You can always flip a coin, and my least favorite and almost a certain guaranteed loss for my scramble partners, A Draw Back.

This is where you go to the #1 handicap hole and whoever had the best score on that hole wins, if that was a tie you go to the #2 handicap hole, if that’s a tie, then go to 3,4,5… etc until someone has a better score. I’ve come in second place in scramble tournaments so many times with this horrible method… It’s no fun and feels like a swift punch to the lower regions. Put us back on the course for at least 1 hole & Give me the chip off or Putt off in a worst case scenario!

P.S. First time, Long time. Cincinnati guy! WHO DEY! Keep up the great work.. Screencaps is the only thing I read on a daily basis!

###

Love to hear from the readers who’ve been lurking only to come out of the woodwork to comment on a subject that they have experience with. Reid’s been scrolling through Screencaps all this time and BOOM, finally, a topic that hit the sweet spot. That’s what it’s all about right there. And it helps that he’s yet another Cincinnati guy.

• Craig V. has tie advice for Jacob:

Quite the predicament that Jacob landed himself in yesterday on the golf course. This can work in the event of a tie or you want to try and win/lose more money. Anyway, my protocol here—and I think this is safe because my wife isn’t a ‘Caps reader (yet) is as follows:

1. Text her from the 18th tee something to the effect of, “Really slow out here. Hope to be home within an hour. I can grab dinner on the way home if you’d like.”
2. Go grab beers from the clubhouse
3. Head to the putting green with your beers and Bluetooth speaker.
4. A 3-hole true alternate shot playoff. One team determines where to start. Whichever team is down after each hole chooses the next starting location/hole and putts second. In the event of a tie after the aggregate, it becomes a sudden-death format.

• Sean C. in Granger, IN has his own advice:

In response to Jacob S and his dilemma with golf ties, I get it.  Whether it’s in an outing or with a small group of friends in a regular weekend round, I feel there needs to be a definite winner.  My first preference is to play that 19th hole (or more if needed). 

But that’s not always an option depending on the course.  Large outings are tough to do playoffs holes because everyone is finishing at different times.  In those, we typically break ties by what teams have the best scores on the hardest handicapped holes.  Start with #1 handicap and go from there until there is a winner.  

But again, I prefer some sort of physical tie-breaker, whether it’s a putt-off or closest to the pin on the driving range (if the course has one).  Most ranges have 100 or 150 yd “holes” or flags to shoot at.  Maybe even a chip/putt contest instead of just putting.  Another option that I’ve used is that since I play with the same few guys MOST of the time, and a playoff isn’t possible, we just carry it over to the next round. 

Basically, use however many holes needed to start as the “tie-breaker” from the previous round, then continue the rest of the round as normal, while using the first few holes as a “double-dip”.  And condolences to Eddie from Acworth.  Mojo looked like a happy pup!  My dogs will get some extra hugs when I get home tonight.  

On dogs!

• Raquel R. writes:

Love the new dog segment. Had to send you a pic of our Jack Russell, Jagger. Happiest darn dog you can ever hope to meet. The only way I could get the wife watching the Canes was to buy her a matching jersey with Jagger’s.

What a face on Jagger! Now I need details on how many hours that dog can chase a ball. Talk about being defenseless against my 5-year-old when it comes to getting donuts. How could I resist throwing the ball for Jagger? I know dog faces and that face screams, “I’m chasing anything that moves 20 hours a day.”

• Jim C. writes:

Joe,

I wanted to take a moment to reinforce how awesome the Screencaps community is. I decided yesterday that it was finally time to let our family dog of 18 years go. My son is a sophomore in college now but this same dog walked with him to kindergarten. In addition to all of the normal family activities, this dog also lived in Germany with us (I’m a veteran) and accompanied us on trips to Berlin and Prague. He was a part of so much that this was really the end of an era for us.

Anyway, I’m holding my dog one last time at home while we wait for the appointment with the vet. I grab my phone to check out Screencaps because I needed my spirits lifted. Scrolling through, I come across the note from Eddie from Acworth who just lost his dog. Somehow, I felt better and fully realize this is part of the deal.

Thanks for cultivating this community.

####

Jim C. in Carmel, IN has been with the Screencaps project a long time. He was one of the first readers to send me an email in May 2021 when I formally asked readers to share their life experiences with me. Now here we are with Jim sharing one of the toughest moments in life. I don’t know Jim besides what he writes to me, but I feel like Jim is the epitome of this column.

We just try to get through life the best we can and then along come these animals that steal our hearts for so many years. Knowing Jim as I do from our correspondence, I know this dog lived an amazing life and will leave behind incredible memories.

####

• Beau in Toledo is back with a late winter email where he dumps out a few thoughts that have been on his mind:

So I’m sitting here drinking a beer in 56-degree weather in Feb-toledo, listening to the idiots on crotch rockets race up and down Laskey road, leaning on their rev limiters, and praying they hit one of the massive potholes (yes I’m a jerk like that, even though I was once that guy) that got me pulled over last night for a possible DUI for dodging said potholes, and of course, I’m thinking about Spring Stuff, like dirt, compost, bees & bats

It’s time.

No, it’s never too early to think about dirt in the yard.  Yeah, I know we’re getting snow Thursday night in the 419.  In fact, I think I committed a #TNML Foul by not mentioning this stuff in the Fall.  Stuff like rain barrels, coffee grounds, last year’s potted plants with the expensive store-bought mud (have you seen the price of bagged dirt?!? #Let’sGoBrandon!), and the veggie waste from all the Crockpot meals we’ve made in the last two months.

I know most of The League has really nice, manicured lawns compared to my tiny Clampett-like MiniFarm, but fertilizer prices are blowing up compared to this time last year, so I thought I’d add a few nuggets of info if it’s worthy.

Coffee Reborn – The Herb Cottage

There’s a couple of massive coffee chains that are tossing millions of gold away… just sayin’.

Also: The rain barrel market is stupid… buy a 55 gal plastic blue, get a bulkhead tank fitting; and elevate it to get a water bucket under the drain.  Mosquito dunks are a must.  Let the kids decorate the barrel for a fun project if it’s visible to company.

Pottery Barn has nice kitchen waste compost pails for said veggie waste if you want to be fancy and all… like with the coffee grounds, I use a repurposed #6 tomato sauce can and empty it regularly.  Free Nutrients. 

Last year’s potted plants?  Burn the plants and even clean paper waste (no heavy print or glazed paper), mix in the dirt, add some coffee grounds, and till in the combo of all in the garden.

Also, I mentioned bees and bats:

Mason Bee Replacement Nesting Tubes 120 Pack | Gardeners.com

Make Your Own Bee Box.  Pretty sure Indy Daryl’s Mom (something tells me she’s like my mom and makes awesome cookies!) would say so. The Kids can help with this one.

The Bat Box? Your call.  But make sure it’s rough-cut wood.  I’m gonna drop the $40 on the one from a local feed store just north of the Lambertville Hardware store.  The creek (crick?? not trying to start another “beans in chili” argument) in my backyard has plenty of bugs, but I also have dragonflies (another benny ftr), so there’s that…

Not to sound like a hippie, but Nature has a way of taking care of Us All.

Oh

And Mr. Joe Kinsey.

Keep OutKicking The Coverage on what You do with ScreenCaps, Sir!

####

This is why it’s great to have a Beau in Toledo around Screencaps. This guy gets our brains thinking ahead and he puts a real-man spin on things. Have I been thinking about dirt? Yes. Have I been thinking about my rain barrel strategy heading into 2022? Yes. Have I been driving by neighborhoods where snowplows have mangled lawns and thought to myself, “Boy, they’re going to need some dirt in spots”?

You’re damn right I have.

Beau’s right. It’s that time of year to get our heads on straight and the message has been received loud and clear. Thank you, Beau.

####

And with that, get out there and have a great day across this great country. Just don’t forget to stop and think about those spring projects that are creeping up. We’re literally weeks away from TNML’s opening day.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

Numbers from :

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Written by Joe Kinsey

I'm an Ohio guy, born in Dayton, who roots for Ohio State and can handle you guys destroying the Buckeyes, Urban Meyer and everything associated with Columbus.

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