NY Couple Gets Married at Dunkin’ Drive-Thru

I’ve openly expressed misgivings about marriage the past few weeks, but apparently a New York couple recently tied the knot at a Dunkin’ Donuts drive-thru.

And I can’t argue against true love.

Selena Stallmer and Brian Dinsmore get a pass for this because, according to them, they saw a Facebook ad from Nextstar NEWS10 that offered a “free wedding” for a couple willing to get married at Dunkin’ Donuts.

Their initial plan was to hold a traditional wedding in June until they saw the ad. Then they heard the word “free,” and they both agreed to change their plans and have some fun.

There’s no better place to give up your financial leverage and personal freedom than a drive-thru at your favorite coffee joint.

“Initially, it was a shocker to me,” Brian Dinsmore said. “And I’m like, you know, this is different. Especially with the year we’ve had with corona and all that.”

They were both considered “essential workers” during the pandemic, so this is a nice little break for the two love birds.

“Ya know, different is better.” Brian concluded.

Listen to these vows:

“Do you promise to dedicate yourself to Selena, to love and care and cherish her through life’s joys and sorrows for all the years of your life?”

Disnmore responded, “I Dunkin’ Do!”

I can’t stand the word “cringe,” but man does it fit here. The ceremony was free of charge, and the couple received a $500 cash prize, a photography session and a basket of Dunkin’ merchandise. If he ends up divorced and sleeping on his best friend’s futon–at least Brian’ll have a free t-shirt.

Anyways, congratulations to the newlyweds. We believe they were meant to bean together and that they have a whole latte years of happiness ahead of them!

Written by Gary Sheffield, Jr

Gary Sheffield Jr is the son of should-be MLB Hall of Famer, Gary Sheffield. He covers basketball and baseball for OutKick.com, chats with the Purple and Gold faithful on LakersNation, and shitposts on Twitter. You can follow him at GarySheffieldJr

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