Man Sets Garage on Fire Because His Cousin Won't Leave Husband for Him

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My favorite news stories are ones that make me feel better about my life, because "normal" to some people is equal parts bizarre and funny and sad.

The following video comes from Ohio, the Alabama of the Midwest, where a local news affiliate is interviewing a woman named Heather Tenney who woke up late last night to find her garage on fire. This feels like your average on-the-scene coverage until the fun starts at 1:07 in. 

After the reporter asks how the fire occurred, Tenney admits that her cousin did it, even though she doesn't want to name names. (Let's hope the Leavittsburg, Ohio police can solve that mystery without Tenney's help.) Why would her cousin do such a thing? Well, you have to watch this...

"He's mad because he can't get with me. I'm married."

BUT IF SHE WASN'T? Game on, cuz.  

Let's talk about how this reporter has no feel for a story. Here's some advice, dude. Next time an unexpected cousin love triangle arson story comes up, maybe ask some follow-up questions. A few suggestions:

Is the suspect your first cousin?

Did you have a prior romantic relationship with your cousin? 

What happened between your husband and your cousin that resulted in a hospital visit? 

Are you related to your husband as well?  

I hate to end this story on a tragic note, but cousin marriage is illegal in Ohio. So no matter how many houses the suspect sets on fire in the name of love he can never give Heather Tenney what her husband already has. 

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Clay Travis is the founder of the fastest growing national multimedia platform, OutKick, that produces and distributes engaging content across sports and pop culture to millions of fans across the country. OutKick was created by Travis in 2011 and sold to the Fox Corporation in 2021. One of the most electrifying and outspoken personalities in the industry, Travis hosts OutKick The Show where he provides his unfiltered opinion on the most compelling headlines throughout sports, culture, and politics. He also makes regular appearances on FOX News Media as a contributor providing analysis on a variety of subjects ranging from sports news to the cultural landscape. Throughout the college football season, Travis is on Big Noon Kickoff for Fox Sports breaking down the game and the latest storylines. Additionally, Travis serves as a co-host of The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show, a three-hour conservative radio talk program syndicated across Premiere Networks radio stations nationwide. Previously, he launched OutKick The Coverage on Fox Sports Radio that included interviews and listener interactions and was on Fox Sports Bet for four years. Additionally, Travis started an iHeartRadio Original Podcast called Wins & Losses that featured in-depth conversations with the biggest names in sports. Travis is a graduate of George Washington University as well as Vanderbilt Law School. Based in Nashville, he is the author of Dixieland Delight, On Rocky Top, and Republicans Buy Sneakers Too.