Imagine having to drop an emergency deuce while at Gettysburg National Park. Or imagine having to take a basic whiz and all of a sudden A MASSIVE TREE JUST CAME CRASHING DOWN ON THE PORT-O-LET AND NOW YOU’RE COMPLETELY TRAPPED. Nightmare fuel, right? It’s right up there with having your buddies tip over a portapotty while you’re in there dropping a Taco Bell-and-draft beer-induced dump.
When it’s your day to survive, it’s your day to survive as a man found out Friday at Gettysburg while inside a porta-potty doing his business, according to Barlow Volunteer Fire Department Assistant Chief Joe Robinson.
“3:52 Company 22 was dispatched for a rescue assignment on Little Round Top off Wheatfield Rd. R22 responded with 4 personnel. I went direct to the scene. Arrived to find one male subject trapped in the porta-potty. R22 crew extricated PT and was transported to local hospital by 54-1 for evaluation. Eng 202 crew assisted with loading pt and disconnected battery from the vehicle,” Robinson wrote on Facebook.
He later told the York (PA) Daily Record that the fire department treated the scene like it would a car crash. The team fired up a chainsaw to cut the tree away and then used a reciprocating saw to cut the porta-potty to pieces. The man was taken to Gettysburg Hospital with non-life-threatening injuries and his sign that he’s meant to be alive.
Clearly, someone was just trying to scare the crap out of him.