Kliff Kingsbury’s Girlfriend Checks In From Arizona, Masters Champions Dinner & Lakers Get Smoked By Suns

TNML sticker update!

Here’s where we stand right now with the hottest sticker in the sticker game — there’s an envelope shortage. Thanks, Biden. Monday night, I bought three packs of the press & seal security envelopes at Target and quickly went through those and figured I would go to Office Max to make a bulk purchase.

Little did I realize that Office Max would only offer a double-security(!) press & seal envelope at double the price of Target’s single-layer of security press & seal envelope.

So back to Target I went to clear them out of envelopes.

Current stats:

  1. 130 pieces of mail were sent out last night. Keep in mind, I took the family to the post office to help me stamp the envelopes and I told them to put 100 envelopes in the box drop slot which says ‘No letters please.’ Yeah, I’m hoping the USPS workers weren’t in a bad mood this morning or we could be in trouble with the first shipment.
  2. 30 pieces of mail, including envelopes to our regional reps were dropped into the correct mail slot
  3. I’ve addressed another 90 envelopes that need to be shipped out later today
  4. There are now two pieces of mail going to Canada; TNML is officially international and I need to update the Twitter bio to acknowledge this news
  5. Fort Wayne, Indiana continues to be a Top 3 city for TNML members, if not No. 1
  6. There seems to be an abnormally large contingent of readers with names starting with ‘J’
  7. I’ve screwed up just 12 envelopes. That seems to be a pretty good waste ratio, considering I’m addressing these envelopes as fast as humanly possible
  8. There are hundreds of sticker requests to go and they won’t stop
  9. Keep in mind, I ordered 500 TNML stickers so don’t get upset if you’re late to the party
  10. By the end of the week, we should be closing in on the TNML being represented in all 50 states. Hawaii and Alaska are holdouts. Pretty sure we also need representatives to step up in Vermont, New Hampshire and South Dakota.

• Tuesday I received an email and sticker request from Djibouti, Africa via a U.S. military member who will stay anonymous.

Here’s part of the email:

Being out here has made me have a greater appreciation for the US and everything that makes it the greatest country to ever exist. Mostly, it’s the people like those in the TNML but it’s also the stunning natural beauty. I would really appreciate a TNML sticker to slap on the mower when I get back stateside in a few weeks. I’ve included my address below. Take care and keep putting out the great content!

There’s just something that reminds me of home every time I read the daily SC.

You’re darn right this TNML member received extra stickers. If you’re a military member around the world who can’t wait to get home and slap that beautiful green TNML sticker on your mower, email me and speak up. I’ll kick my friends right out of the sticker giveaway process and you’re going to the front of the line.

The email from Africa should serve as a reminder to each and every one of us that this column is a godsend to people missing home.

On Screencaps/TNML gear

• I have a call with the graphic artist right after publishing this post to hammer out some ideas for new shirts and other offerings. I understand you guys like pocket shirts. I’ll relay the information and see what we can come up with. First up on the agenda is the 2022 TNML jersey shirt.

On the Masters practice rainout

• Over the weekend, I received a message from a long-time Twitter follower friend who reminded me he was heading to Augusta with his father after winning the Masters practice round ticket lottery for the 2020 event. The China virus ruined 2020 and 2021 was also a mess, but the Masters honored the tickets for this year. Then Tuesday’s practice round was rained out.

Fans will now be allowed to purchase the same tickets for 2023.

The journey rolls on for those who just want to see it once before they die. Keep hammering that ticket lottery and hope for the best.

On advice for new, first-time homeowners

• Tuesday, I was driving through our neighborhood and noticed new homeowners hacked down beautiful lilac bushes that helped block their backyard view of the highway (the bushes are in the association right away, I believe) and I decided right there that Screencaps readers need to provide advice for new homeowners.

I’ll go first:

  • Let the plants get out of the ground and grow in for a summer before you start hacking! See what you have. Smell them! Call a greenhouse to have them analyze the situation.
  • Don’t make rash landscaping decisions in early April, especially in NW Ohio. Throw on a pot of chicken and noodles over mashed potatoes and relax for a minute. Grab a beer, sit on the patio, chill.
  • I’m all for hacking overgrown nonsense. Those poor lilac bushes didn’t deserve that buzzcut.

What’s some other advice for those first-time homeowners?

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

On food

• Indy Daryl writes:

I know this is in relation to a conversation over the winter months. But, it was a rainy, coldish day yesterday so we decided to make our Instant Pot Chicken noodle soup (incredibly simple and delicious… can send the recipe along if people want it). And I was curious, I know there is love for crockpots, but wondered what folks thought of the instant pot.

We have had ours for a couple years now and really like it. I describe it to people this way: a 45-minute crockpot meal. It isn’t “instant” to be sure, but it does fit our busier schedules where we would constantly forget to prep the crockpot in the morning. Just thought I would through it out there!

####

Chicken & noodles over mashed potatoes have been on my mind and with Saturday’s high expected to hit 40, I think it only makes sense to make it a nap food day…while I watch The Masters. In fact, I just cleared my schedule.

On a Meyer lemon tree and losing a loved one

• Paul T. in Round Rock, TX writes:

Good morning Joe, sure glad spring is in full swing down here in Central Texas…I always tried to keep my yard looking nice…but now with the TNML it really has got me motivated to really try and improve my yard…as we go into another TNML season I have also planted a Meyer lemon tree. I have 2 dogs that have wreaked havoc on some of my past foliage…they took out my last lemon tree with such fury…it was like it was personal a couple years ago.

I have now tried again…I had placed field wire about 4 feet tall around it as a deterrent (they were smart enough to simply push over) and then fertile potting soil and tree with nice citrus notes was ripe for destroying.

My father-in-law is the one who gave me the first tree 2yrs ago. He passed away 3 weeks ago on March 14th. I was able to see him on the 13th and say goodbye. He grew up on a farm in Kansas where his parents grew produce for their stand and raised chickens. They have lived in the same house in Houston for 41 yrs and his yard, especially the back, was full of flowers, plants…all kinds of things. I had told him about the league and thought it was nice.

When driving home from work on the 14th after hearing of his passing that morning from my wife I decided to go the nursey and get another Meyer lemon tree…brought it home and set it on the table on back porch and showed my dogs (who really are sweet) and calmly asked them not destroy this one…well so far…so good (literally knocked on genuine wood)…I am hopeful they can continue to keep cool. Thanks again for Screencaps

####

First, condolences on the loss of your father-in-law. You better believe we’re rooting for you and this Meyer lemon tree project, especially considering the sentimental value at play here. Next, you’re definitely getting stickers.

And keep the updates coming on this lemon tree. Show us how you’re protecting it from the dogs. Guys around here have given up on rooting for baseball teams. They’re begging to root on the growth of that tree.

PaellaFest 2022!

Jim M. in West Lafayette, IN writes:

I know it sounds kind of old, but your daily post is a small bit of sanity in a sea of insanity. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I wanted to follow up with some more news about life getting back to normal. I had mentioned in an earlier email about my basement bar, and our first time making paella as part of a family gathering. I had sent this picture showing you the size of the pan.

Well, we picked this final four weekend to do it again. And unfortunately, we did it Saturday, through wind and rain. Sunday was beautiful, but everyone was traveling home. So through wind and snow and rain and hail or whatever (well just rain and wind), we persevered. Talk about doing hard things unintentionally. But in the end it was well worth the effort. It is about a three hour process, and we put up a tent to protect the grill -and occasionally had to hold on to it to stop it from blowing away. Even while it was strapped to deck railing. But here is how it pretty much starts.

Rabbit is traditional but we used chicken, after browning you add aromatics and vegetables and tomatoes and special rice from Spain. And then lots and lots of broth.

In the end after adding sausage, mussels and shrimp, and cooking off all the broth which in turn cooks the rice – you get this:

This size feeds about 15 or so. And after being out in the cold, damp early spring of north-central Indiana, I was hungry. We learned a bunch more about technique we will apply next time – hopefully in the fall when it is warmer!

As I close – if you have any TNML stickers sign me up. I had to cheat this week, I had to do the initial season mow yesterday before it rains the rest of the week, but I am going to try and get back on schedule next within the next two weeks. As the season starts you are more a slave to the grass than a dictator. Though I did take the opportunity to enjoy my first mowing beer:

####

You’re darn right Jim M. is getting stickers. If you’re providing content like this for the community, it is my duty to move you to the front of the line.

Listen, I have to get this day rolling. We’re up against 10 am ET and readers are refreshing their phones to see the latest from Screencaps.

I cannot express enough how grateful I am to hear from so many people across this incredible country. Never forget you’re the backbone to the American Experience. And to those citizens around the world who read Screencaps to get a little slice of home, keep sending those emails. Share your thoughts. Share what you’re seeing around you.

Have a great day and hopefully I can find more envelopes!

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

Numbers from :

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Written by Joe Kinsey

I'm an Ohio guy, born in Dayton, who roots for Ohio State and can handle you guys destroying the Buckeyes, Urban Meyer and everything associated with Columbus.

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