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It’s Saturday and I have to get to the ball diamonds, so let’s do random thoughts in your heads

• Ryan S. in NW Ohio writes:

Getting ready to head out for my son’s U8 soccer game. No better way to advertise this great league than a field full of parents.

Shout out to the coach (wife). Hopefully we’ll come home 6-1!

I also think I have a problem because I think about mowing every soccer field I go to. Just want to stripe it up.


It’s always so nice to see these shirts in the wild. They’er perfect.

Did anyone see this guy on the news this week?

• My dad called Friday to say he showed up to a job site to drop off a piece of rental equipment and a guy he hadn’t seen in like five years jumps off a skid steer and tells dad that he say him on the news Thursday night.

Dad said he was all confused and then his old friend says, “Yeah, I saw you holding two monster mushrooms on the news.”

Now, the story gets even more interesting because the guys says he was watching Fox News, but then he left the room and when he gets up, his wife changes it to the local news. The guy comes back in the room and there’s my dad with the mushrooms.

So that means we have some drama around this whole thing where my dad’s mushrooms were on the news. It was a segment about morel mushroom season, which is done in SW Ohio, but it’s a huge weekend in northern Michigan.

It would make sense for a Fox News segment to feature dad since Fox pays my paycheck and there has to be one producer who cruises Screencaps for content.

Let me know if you saw this man on the news this week. We’re trying to track down the video for his archives: joekinsey@gmail.com

A true professional

• Chris S. in Antioch, IL writes:

I have to say, I may be revising my head nod rule. If Chase Patterson can mow with a 9 month old on his lap, while driving a zero turn and keeping the stripes straight, I may have to wave. Hats off, sir.

Great excuse to miss TNML night

• Louie in Savannah, GA is very busy right now making out lineup combinations and figuring out his pitching rotation.

I had to miss league night again this week but I have a great reason… Walk off win for my tiny, 7-8 year old Red Sox. 2 outs, bottom of the 5th. My son on first and my de-facto nephew at the plate. Damned right I was fired up, and sporting at 2010 Youkilis jersey. I know you are enjoying your son’s little league adventures these days so I figured you’d enjoy this.

Stay safe and keep that great content coming.

P.S. – the delay was caused by the fact that I didn’t know there was video of this awesome moment in time until just now. Lol

That’s Louie hauling it to home plate to bring in the boys. Don’t pull a hamstring, Louie.

TNML is running wild through the veins of those who feel the pull to get into the game

• Mark B. in Fairfield, CA writes:

I’ve been reading the various TNML season preparation and opening day festivities over the last few months and weeks. It has really “pumped” me up to improve my game. After about 10 years of letting a DH tend to my responsibilities, I made the decision to get back in the game a little over 2 years ago. TNML has really motivated me to up my game.

There is nothing better than pulling that cord and hearing the engine fire. The real satisfaction, though, happens when I use the Stihl hand held blower and clean everything up. My neighbors (I live in the land of fruits and nuts, otherwise known as Northern California) all have the battery powered blowers because they have all gone to zeroscaping or artificial grass. I love showing them a little gas power and creating a little noise.

I’m going to stay in the game and keep competing because every time I read about or see another TNML participant’s accomplishments each week it is invigorating. Besides it’s great therapy being outside, cutting my little piece of paradise and showing the world what I can accomplish.

If you ever get more stickers, it would be awesome to display it on the mower. Going to order something from the store. Thinking the hat would be great right now but truly epic in about 6 months after some sweat, dirt and a little love help really break it in.

Property taxes and drug running

• Joe M. writes:

Our county has decided my house is worth 40% more than it was last year, and will tax us and the other “rich” people appropriately.  During the oil crash in Houston, they played the same game, housing values always go up to max allowed by law, without regard for how many were laid off (hundreds of thousands). 

For all the lawyers in the screencaps audience, imagine hearing, “market value is not indicative of assessed value,” from the county.  There’s a reason they have to pay for a Sheriff/LEO to stand outside these meetings.  I like my lawn and my view, but I can (and will) move a mile in nearly any direction and cut my taxes in half.  I have two kids, 10 and 8, but at what they have shown they are going to charge us (Fort Bend County, famous for the idiot KP George, county “Judge” for asking Disney to relocate to this madhouse of fiscal irresponsibility) I could literally pay a single first year elementary school teacher out of Stephen F Austin to teach 3 and 5th grade stuff for less than my tax bill (they only need to work about five hours a day, so they can tutor others and it evens out). 

Put two or three families together, the economics get real clear, real fast.  COVID taught my neighbors how to use pods of 4-5 families to pod-school and rotate subjects, etc., and it worked.  Sorry COVID-idiots and teachers’ unions, many parents have been shown the skeleton key to not having to put up with district crap.

All of that is to lay the ground work for “why do people run drugs?”  Border Officers Seize 800lbs of Meth worth 18M from one dude .  The Mexican desert isn’t a joke, but that’s $20k a pound in value.  Maybe the mule makes 5% of that, but I bet half the screencaps dudes, properly hydrated, could carry 40 pounds 50 miles. 

And we’re a group that’s probably generally well fed.  Given the amount of snacks, chairs and drinks most of us haul to little league games, soccer games, etc., we should be the audience the cartels come to for a little extra cash here and there.  I’m kidding, but how much does $18M worth of Fentanyl weigh?  We have that answer: A half kilo (1.1 pounds) is $1M.  Therefore, for less than the weight of my kids’ lacrosse bag (not including water), I could make $5+M. 

If you get arrested, you’ll be released, and just try again.  Ozark and Walter White are old school.  It’ll pay for the next tank of diesel and the 30 pack of Keystone Light, for sure.  No need to hike the Grand Canyon, just hike the Sonoran Desert, get rich, and you won’t even need a COVID test to get back into the country! 😃

I hear you chirping, people in states with an income tax… Property tax is controllable, I can move within my state.  You fellas that live in GA, LA, OH, etc., can’t go anywhere to escape your income taxes. 

Thanks for putting up with my missives, Joe!  Taxes get everyone salty, but when I found out we got Jarvis Landry and the Honey Badger within the same week, it’s been vaulted to the next level!


What a rollercoaster of an email for a Saturday morning that will get you guys fired up to go out there and attack the day. And to be fair, Joe is using fentanyl prices from 2018 via one of my former employers, so it’s safe to say his fentanyl valuation should be higher, but you get his point.

Which brings me to my next question: Which state has the best combination of taxes to quality of life/value?

And a final message before I run & because I like Tim G. in NW OH’s property

• Tim G. in NW Ohio writes:

Completely forgot to send in my TNML pic this week! Had to do a Thursday afternoon cut today so I capfuls hit the road for a work trip. Still very wet ground and a third 5.5” cut of the season. Still trying to get caught up from the wet spring in NW Ohio.


Make sure you guys send me emails on the best places to live when you figure in the taxes. I’m intrigued to see a list we come up with on that one.

Have an incredible day. I hear we’re being blessed with yet another partly sunny day, which will be our sixth straight. My wife and I have eaten lunch together on the patio for the first time in 12 years as our dogwood tree is blooming. It’s been a very nice weather run and I’m about to take full advantage of it yet again today.

Take care.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

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Written by Joe Kinsey

Joe Kinsey is the Senior Director of Content of OutKick and the editor of the Morning Screencaps column that examines a variety of stories taking place in real America.

Kinsey is also the founder of OutKick’s Thursday Night Mowing League, America’s largest virtual mowing league.

Kinsey graduated from University of Toledo.

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