History Shows That Stock Market Will Collapse If Phillies Win

If the Philadelphia Phillies win this year's World Series, not only will we hear it endlessly from their rabid, obnoxious fans, but it may also have a devastating impact on our wallets.

Sure it would seem like a great story if the underdog Phillies go on to defeat the Houston Astros - winners of 4 of the last 5 AL Pennants and the 2017 World Series.

But not when it effects your wallet.

Social media is losing its mind over the fact that Philadelphia may have some sort of omen over not only their fastballs, but the economy.

The argument goes like this: The last three times a Philadelphia baseball team (originally known as the Athletics, then the Phillies) won the World Series, a devastating financial crises followed.

PHILADELPHIA BASEBALL INTERTWINED WITH ECONOMY

Let's break it down:

1929 - The Philadelphia Athletics win the World Series, the same year as the worst stock market collapse in U.S. history.

1930 - The Philadelphia Athletics repeat. World is in the Great Depression.

1980 - The Philadelphia Phillies win and America's economy hits the worst recession since the World War 2 era.

2008 - The Philadelphia Phillies win again. And we all know what happened here - the Great Recession caused by the US housing bubble bursting.

Oh no.

What will happen this time around?

We're already seeing signs that we are headed towards a recession (if not already in one) with rising inflation everywhere. Add in higher priced goods, an unstable situation in Eastern Europe, gas prices being manipulated by Iran and the Saudis, and it sure seems that the Phillies have all the power once again.

Are the people of Philly willing to screw the rest of our 401K's just so they can celebrate another Championship? If you've met anyone from Philly you already know the answer.

COINCIDENCE OR FATE?

Is there some sort of Benjamin Franklin curse on the country that he helped build? Is he pissed off at America's banking system and relying on an unelected Federal Reserve, rather than Franklin's idea he proposed with The Bank of North America?

What I'm saying is, unless you are a diehard Phillies fan, you best be either rooting for the Astros (I would never) or abstaining entirely from the World Series (Hockey sounds great this time of year).

But wait just a minute.

What happens if the Astros win and the economy doesn't collapse or continue spiraling towards a longer recession?

Well, crap.

That means the Astros would be seen as the saviors of the free market. As a Yankees fan, whose team just got swept by Houston, I can't have them defeat us, win the World Series AND save the economy. I'll never be able to sleep.

Maybe I'll just take matters into my own hands and buy a stable, reliable currency of the future. Bitcoin.

Oh wait.

Written by
Mike “Gunz” Gunzelman has been involved in the sports and media industry for over a decade. He’s also a risk taker - the first time he ever had sushi was from a Duane Reade in Penn Station in NYC.