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It’s time to tap some kegs around here

My brother, who fashions himself somewhat of an expert on running keg lines through a fridge and regulating beer flow, is on his way north this morning for Operation Tap That Keg. A few years ago he suggested I put a two-line system into my basement wall to go along with a keg fridge. Well, the wall is done, now it’s his turn to run the lines and make sure I’m suckin’ down a cold one tonight while watching conference tournament semi-finals action.

I still need to trim out the box and grout that subway tile, but you can clearly see that it’s beyond time to start yanking on the pulls. My plan is to get a sixtel from a local brewery — probably a golden ale — and get to work on drinking the 56 12 ouncers in that keg. That should keep me busy during March Madness. As for the other line, my wife wanted one for root beer for the kids when they have parties. That won’t happen very often so it looks like at some point soon we’ll have two beer lines running and I won’t have many reasons to go to bars.

Yes, I’ll have Busch Light on tap during the summer. A pitcher of Busch after mowing on Thursday nights sounds incredible.

• The news finally hit Friday that ARod and JLo are no more. Thursday I was looking through both of their Instagram accounts to see what was going on because they’d been very quiet with their fake perfect lives over the last few weeks. Then things break Friday. I’ve been at this so long that I can tell when ARod’s fake relationships are nearly over. I might not be able to work on cars like some of you, but I sure know when these made for social media relationships end. It’s my skill.

• Have you seen the Sarah Silverman video that’s out? Sarah clearly needs a weekend of suckin’ down garage beers, waving at neighbors and telling dirty jokes on the patio after the kids go to bed. She’s starting to see the light that politics was making her miserable. She’d probably love Morning Screencaps and the fun we have around here.

• Bitcoin crossed over $60,000 this morning. Don’t be shocked when guys sitting on fortunes buy more digital art in the $100 million range.

• Am I reading that right? Parts of Colorado could get four feet of snow today through Sunday and Denver could get two feet? Let me guess, it’ll be completely melted by Tuesday. It’s going to be 54 and beautiful here as we continue to have the driest start to March on record. I can’t remember the last time there was significant rain, which is insane for Ohio this time of year.

OK, that’s enough. Enjoy your weekend.

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Tim Tebow

Written by Joe Kinsey

Joe Kinsey is the Senior Director of Content of OutKick and the editor of the Morning Screencaps column that examines a variety of stories taking place in real America.

Kinsey is also the founder of OutKick’s Thursday Night Mowing League, America’s largest virtual mowing league.

Kinsey graduated from University of Toledo.

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  3. I thought about getting a kegerator once but I couldn’t justify it because kegs cost give or take the same as a case. Now I’m a beer snob with ipa and various porters and stouts so I like variety.

  9. Screw Sarah Sliverman, she fed the beast and it came back to bite her and the rest of us. A couple of years ago she was saying that Seinfeld and the ‘older’ guys have to change with the times when they complained that they couldn’t play woke colleges anymore.

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