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The Great Shrimp Conspiracy

The community has been patiently waiting for Jim M. to drop his shrimp conspiracy and today is your lucky day. All great news agencies know that you drop huge reports on Thursdays so they turn into topics on the Sunday morning talk shows.

Take it away, Jim!

Ok Joe, Christmas is coming and we’re all going to have some form of shrimp, bake stuffed, cocktail, wild caught, farm-raised. Doesn’t matter. It’s my contention that the shrimp industry and the National Supermarket Association have conspired to confuse the public on sizes and prices.  UNREGULATED!!  We only need 5 sizes! Like in the chart.  Unregulated Joe!

Jim continues:

So normal size in chart 1

Conspiracy starts in example 2…11 sizes!

Outta control in example 3….17 different sizes!!!   

Granted some are the same size with shell on, but when the shell is removed, it is a fact that the size changes and drops down to next lowest size / price ect.

The more I research this the more convoluted and confusing for the public it gets! 

Wait till I get all the Xmas sale ads together. The same market will have 3 different prices and terms for the same size shrimp.

Super extra jumbo tiny colossal super extra medium small large extra!!!……wtf?…

Next; proof in the ads


Listen, it’s early and I need a little time to wrap my mind around this crustacean conspiracy, but I’m all ears if you guys want to throw your support behind Jim.

To be honest, the only shrimp I buy during the holidays comes from Costco and those cocktail packs they sell next to the street tacos. I don’t honestly know if I’m being ripped off or not.

But I want Jim to keep the conspiracy content coming, especially when it involves shrimp. These are the topics guys want to talk about at the job site. It’s a nice diversion from the political conversations that never do anything but unnecessarily fire up guys who typically get along.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

My Brittney Griner trade take

A report from the North Dakota contingent on the Mini North Vegas

• Dillon L. in Crosby, N.D. writes:

Hey Joe, all this talk about Vegas has got me wondering if any of you guys have been to/heard of “Mini-Vegas” or “NorthVegas”?  I’m talking about Deadwood, SD.  Now, there is obviously a large difference in climates and size between the two, but as you know living in the Great White North you gotta do what you gotta do.  

If you’ve never been there… it have around 20 casinos, around 5 sportsbooks and a ton of history around the area also.  (If you’ve ever seen the show Deadwood).  It is only about 10-15 minutes from Sturgis during the summer for the motorcycle rally and about an hour from Mt. Rushmore.  

Now, the casinos aren’t going to be insanely fancy but they are Vegas-style and get the job done.  What I like about it is that it is not a place for super high rollers.  Most tables are 5, 10, 25 minimums and the restaurants are reasonably priced.  Drinks are midwest cheap for the most part (at least compared to Vegas) and are complementary if you are gambling.  There are quite a few buffets as well as steakhouse style places.  Our Crosby group has been known to frequent a sportsbook or two which have just opened in the last couple years and the number is growing.  Deadwood also does a pretty good job of bringing in talent for concerts and has a ton of old-west styled attractions also.  As for transportation it is just about the right size to be able to walk from one end to the other on main street, but they do have trolleys that literally only charge $2.00 (last time we rode).  

I’m definitely not trying to be an advertisement for SD tourism, (although I will fight to say Kristi Noem might possibly be the hottest woman in government though) but was curious if you or the screencaps community has ever heard of NorthVegas.  

P.S.  It was -35 this morning up here in Crosby.  #DBAP 

French pizza kiosk

• Mike T. writes:

I read about these never seen one. Kiosk that takes your order and gets bake’s your pizza in 3 minutes.

€ 10 a pizza


Are there pizza kiosks on college campuses across the U.S.? If not, how do we go about starting the Screencaps Pizza Kiosk Company? I want one of these outside every dorm in the U.S. I want one of these outside every frat house in the U.S.

There’s no way the French are ahead of the curve on pizza kiosks. One of you knows this business. Tell me someone is already rich off these things here in the U.S.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

Slumming it in Vegas

• Todd D. writes:

The best deal in Vegas had to be at Hooters Casino. They had $1 Blackjack all the time and 0.25 cent wings after midnight. When is going to Hooters after the nightclub a bad idea? And $0.25 cent wings? I can’t tell you how many times my broke younger self walked out of that place with the sun coming up happy as can be, on a college-kid budget. It was definitely the go-to spot after a night out.  

Todd also sent over a 53-page report on current blackjack conditions around the country and my head is spinning over all the data. We’re talking stats on deck cuts, the edge held by the casino over the player, table minimums, reports on deck penetration, and all sorts of data that there’s no way I’m using at 2 a.m.

It’s like reading a horse race program.

• Steve in Grand Junction, Colorado writes:

Slumming it? I’m sorry Joe, but I can make some Screencapers look like whales splashing chips around.

On a bachelor party back in my degenerate days (before wife/kids/mortgage), we once packed 6 guys in hotel room. This was in a low-budget off-Strip hotel, not the Rain Man suite at Caesars.

As for gambling, my bank only allowed 3 ATM withdrawls a day, (this is late 90’s), so I remember having to “Cinderella” it, which means, waiting until midnight to get another withdrawal. 

The absolute lowest point may have been when a buddy and I, (both of us out of cash), resorted to  the “drink mooch.” This is when you scoot in close to your friends playing at the craps table. Whenever the cocktail waitress would come around, we’d focus on the felt, shouting out, “Let’s go 8!” or “Come on hard six!” to make it look like we were playing, so as to get free cocktail service. After getting our free drinks, we’d of course, have to get one of our buddies to tip her for us.

Good times.

Georgia Senate results

• Chip R. in Alabama wants to have a word with Georgia fans:

Congratulations to UGA nation on their vote Tuesday to confirm that the best player in University of Georgia history and the second best RB in the history of college football does not represent them. They’re better than that.


Go Dawgs! 

Doing Hard Things…for a living

• Bill C. writes:

(Another) Bill C checking in. The city of Jackson (MS) is replacing all of the GPS commercial and residential water meters to ones with satellite tech. Unfortunately, this will have no direct impact on water purity but it should indirectly. 

This is McKinley from Alexandria, LA. He is one of the contractors installing/replacing these meters. He drives 3 hours each way weekly for this job and has been doing it since January! He says it takes him about a half hour to replace one and does about 15 a day. Says some of the contractors can do around 20 a day. I can’t imagine doing this over and over for 10+ months not to mention what it was like during the summer. He says the pay is good so it’s worth it (one of the contractors was driving a Benz). I think Indy Daryl would approve. 

Hope you and Mrs Screencaps and the boys have a merry Christmas this year. I got two battery daddy’s to give away wrapped and under the tree. Keep up the good work. 

Screencaps mailbag

• Zach W. writes:

Do you think Deion Sanders being named head coach of Colorado will be a rebirth for the football program, or just a giant clown show for the university?

Of course it’s the rebirth of Colorado football. Eyeballs will be on Colorado. Talent will come to Colorado. The team will get some primetime spots because Deion will be on the sideline and money will pour into the program.

Here’s what Colorado fans should be asking: What happens to this program after Deion eventually leaves for a bigger job?

Then what?

Until then, let’s all stop and be happy that Deion is making college football interesting in Colorado. It’s been way too long since that great spectacle of a college setting has had some excitement.

Enjoy it.

And with that, let’s get rolling. It’s Raiders at Rams night, so you know what that means … possible stabbings and violent fights at SoFi Stadium. Be careful if you’re headed to the game. Prison shivs will be out and about.

Have a great day across this incredible country and try your best not to blow a blood vessel over the Brittney Griner news. Let Clay do that.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

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Written by Joe Kinsey

I'm an Ohio guy, born in Dayton, who roots for Ohio State and can handle you guys destroying the Buckeyes, Urban Meyer and everything associated with Columbus.

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