Danny Torres Takes Us Into The Weekend, Antonio Brown Punched In The Mouth & Cocaine Washes Ashore

And just like that, the preschooler and 3rd grader are out of the house

Sorry for the lateish Friday Screencaps. I had to make my annual signs for the kids to hold on the first day of school, then we had to get photos, then we had to go to school and watch all the suburban parents get photos of their kids going off to school, then we had to get the photo where the 3rd grader gets out of the minivan. Then I had to check to see if my wife shed a tear (allegedly her eyes were just glistening).

Then it was time to navigate out of the school drop-off line *cautiously* because of all the new kindergartner parents who didn’t study up on the rules during the offseason. The old vets know you don’t even think of opening your driver’s side door or it’ll be ripped off by a massive Ford Expedition hauling ass like it’s leaving a pit box at Bristol Motor Speedway.

Look at that 3 1/2″ cut on the side yard! The turf has never been healthier!

As for the sign thing, it’s a tribute to all the moms out there with their specialized chalkboards and their “What do I want to be when I grow up” signs. This is how us dads do it. I’ve been cutting up Amazon boxes for this occasion going back to when the 3rd grader was in pre-pre-preschool. He was two. He turns nine next week, so this isn’t his first rodeo with the corrugated cardboard.

The preschooler isn’t as hard to coach these days. I can actually communicate with him on sign placement so all of his great-aunts can see his smile on Facebook.

I just hope the kids will keep playing along as the years start to pile up.

• The kids going back to school also marks the first time I’m working alone on a Friday during my OutKick career. I love my wife and kids, but let’s be honest, I’ve done my best blogging work over a long illustrious career when they’ve been out of the house.

• Moving along…did you see that Elon Musk is now showing off a robot humanoid that Tesla’s developing? Musk says the robots will “eliminate dangerous, repetitive, boring tasks.” Looks like my blogging career will be just fine, no matter how many humanoids Musk dumps into the world.

And if you thought the Tesla robots are an answer to the worker shortage, you’d be right. Or we could eliminate all the money being pumped into unemployment and the eviction moratorium.

• It’s time to cut this one short. The school sign thing set me back a half-hour. Have a great weekend. I’m off to the Wiffleball tournament at the end of the work day.

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Written by Joe Kinsey

I'm an Ohio guy, born in Dayton, who roots for Ohio State and can handle you guys destroying the Buckeyes, Urban Meyer and everything associated with Columbus.

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