Paige Spiranac Debuts Steel Curtain Bikini, Sports Media Applauds Shannon Sharpe & Silly Caitlin Clark Hate

It's Thursday, the Dolphins are playing tonight (gulp), Al and Kirk are in the booth & Shannon Sharpe is making some lady named Michelle a household name as we speak. 

What a time to be alive. When I bitch and moan about the lack of content during the summer months, THIS is what I'm talking about. You will never, ever compete with the #content we get in the fall. Never. It's unmatched. 

It's why I love this time of year. Days like today. Right now. Everyone start drinking, because it's time to pregame for some Thursday Night Football! And then we get football tomorrow. And the day after that. And the day after that …

… and the day after that! Buddy, let's go have ourselves big night. 

On that note, welcome to a Thursday Nightcaps – the one where Paige Spiranac cheers on the terrible Pittsburgh Steelers in the only way she can. Didn't know Pageviews was a fan of the Steel City, but I'm a fan of bikinis, which means I guess I am, too. It's only fair. 

What else? I've got Shannon Sharpe fallout (duh) – including some comments from "Michelle" – and then we'll head across the pond to check in on Alica Schmidt, the World's Sexiest Athlete. 

She's on vacation this week, you know, and she's starting things off on the right foot. You'll see. 

OK, let's get this show on the road. I've got a game to watch and a heart ready to be broken. Pencils up! It's time for a Thursday 'Cap!

This Shannon Sharpe story has me on red alert 

Look, I didn't want to start today's class with Shannon Sharpe sex tape talk, but I'm a man of the people, and I have an obligation to dive in. 

Nobody really believes Shannon, right? Like, he's so full of crap you almost have to respect it. I wrote about Shannon's *accidental* Instagram Live romp in the sack earlier today, so feel free to check that out after class. It's worth your time, of course. 

For those who don't have time, here's a quick refresher: Shannon is going internet viral today because he live-streamed himself going to town in the bedroom last night. You don't see anything – thank God – but buddy, the audio is jarring. I won't share it here, but some say you can hear it here. 

Some say that. I don't, but some do. 

Anyway, Shannon originally went with the "I was hacked!" excuse before coming clean on his podcast last night and admitting it was him – and some gal named "Michelle." How do we know her name is Michelle? 

Well, Shannon – through all of his huffing and puffing – calls her Michelle. That's how. The internet – including a couple high-profile names – jumped at that one:

Solid work from Michelle and Jane. I like when people don't take things too seriously, so that sort of humor is right down my alley. 

So is this kind, courtesy of Pat McAfee:

Yeah, I'm with Pat on this one. Some may scoff at it, but whatever. He's right, by the way. Shannon Sharpe was THE trend on Twitter today. All day. From morning till right now. 

You wanna know how many views his YouTube podcast– which I won't name here because it's a copycat of my class and my lawyers will be in touch – had? 1.5 million. That's easily – easily – the most ever. Like, it ain't even close. 

Maybe business was down? You see this economy? I wouldn't be surprised. So maybe Shannon just decided to pull a rabbit from his hat, heave a final Hail Mary, and have some off-camera sex to bring in some much-needed eyeballs? 

It's not the route I would go – yet – but it's one I certainly believe is plausible. 

PS: fellas, whatever you do, don't let the missus hear that audio … EVER. We can't compete with that. No shot. I got winded just listening to it. We don't need those unrealistic expectations forced upon us. 

PPS: INSANE 180 by Shannon Sharpe with these two clips. Heel-turn of the century. 

Paige Spiranac is ready for some Steel City football

Goodness. This is where my biggest beef is right now with Shannon. You can't have it both ways, pal. Either lean into it, or deny, deny, deny. If Breaking Bad taught us anything, it's that there are no half-measures (great episode, by the way). 

You can't sit there and wax poetic for two minutes about how your heart sank and how you called all your family members to apologize for your *accidentally* leaked sex tape – what a call to make! – and then in the next breath talk about how Michelle is gonna have to ice up. It just doesn't work like that.

Oh well. I've spent far too much time talking about Shannone Sharpe having sex today, but it's the job I signed up for when I agreed to teach this class. Not all heroes wear capes, you know. 

Save us, Paige:

Charley Hull rips darts with some help, Nick Castellanos' resume is elite, and the Caitlin Clark hate is silly

Well, there you have it, fellas. Steelers -2.5 at Denver on Sunday is the mortal lock of the century. Had Shannon just put that bet in, he wouldn't have had to make the sex tape. Oh well.

Ya snooze, ya lose!

PS: Steelers are currently No. 26 in my inaugural power rankings, which returned today for Season 2. And if you remember anything from last season, it's that I never – never – shamelessly plug my power rankings here in class. 

So definitely don't go read them. 

OK, rapid-fire time so I can go watch the Dolphins melt on a national stage. First up? Yesterday was the anniversary of 9/11, as we noted at the end of class. 

While it was obviously a somber day and a day of remembrance, it was also a day to make money if you knew anything about the legacy of one Nick Castellanos:

I mean, it's truly insane at this point. This Nick Castellanos has no heart whatsoever. He doesn't give a shit about your feelings or personal life. If something is wrong in the world, he's gonna send a ball into orbit. 

Those are just the rules at this point. 

Look at that list!!! If we can't have Barry Bonds or Pete Rose in Cooperstown, we at least deserve that list. It's maybe the most impressive thing I've ever seen. 

Next? Anyone got a light?

Another heater from Charley Hull. This chick is the best. What a time for women's sports right now, huh? You've got Charley Hull ripping darts like it's 1984 again, and Caitlin Clark setting records pretty much every single night at this point. 

Wait, what? Y'all don't like Caitlin now?!

Alica Schmidt takes us home

Yeah, I'm with Kevin here. This is silly. 

Folks, I don't understand why everyone is shocked that Caitlin Clark might be a democrat. Um, she just spent four years on a college campus. 

Do you not remember how absolutely miserable and liberal and woke college campuses are? I don't care that it was Iowa. Every single college campus across this country is liberal, with a couple SEC exceptions (looking at you, Oxford). 

Her boyfriend is also a Kamala Harris guy. I would imagine most of her teammates are, too. 

Of course she's probably voting for Kamala Harris! No shit. But you know what? She didn't shove it down our throats when asked about it yesterday. In fact, she didn't take the bait at all. She just simply said to go vote. That's it. 

And guess what? That's OK! You know, not too long ago (OK, maybe long ago), conservatives and liberals used to mingle together just fine. Hell, we didn't care. Until 2016, nobody really gave a shit. 

I promise, it's OK. You don't need to hate Caitlin Clark now just because she liked Taylor Swift's post about endorsing Kamala Harris. Do you see how silly that sounds? We're better than that. 

OK, that's enough soap-boxing for today. I'm off to get my heart ripped out by Tua and the fellas. 

Take us home, Alica. 

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).

Are you surprised Caitlin Clark might be liberal? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.