Carrie Underwood Working On Cobra Kai Song, John Daly's Latest Hole In One & The UGA Barn Sign Has Been Updated

I might be an addict

I know that subheadline is quite dramatic for a Saturday morning with the NFL playoffs kicking off at 4:30 this afternoon, but I need to get this out on the table.

Yesterday, as promised, I took my son to after-school duckpin bowling. It was our second time duckpin bowling in six days and I can feel the addiction building inside my body. It's happening after just two duckpin bowling experiences in my life. My brain is now obsessed with things like picking up multiple spares in a game, getting strikes (hasn't happened and my 9-year-old son is most likely going to beat me to that accomplishment) and breaking 100. These mini bowling balls with no finger holes have my brain racing.

This community is so huge that I'm sure there's someone reading this who averages 150 and is laughing at my low-hanging fruit goals. But for us rookies, we're still trying to learn the spin, the speeds, the arm angles, etc. Do I use a two-step motion like I'm at a full-size bowling alley? Is it better to stand stationary and let the arm do the work? Can I go ambidextrous to pick up tough spares?

Some guys lay in bed with their heads spinning thinking about how judges will react to their Texas chili. I'm the guy laying there thinking about the perfect spin to take out the head duckpin and then plow through the remaining pins to get my first strike.

And let me tell you, this duckpin bowling drug ($26/hr) is more expensive than my golf addiction. Throw in mozzarella sticks and lemonade for my son and we're damn near to a budget airline flight to Florida.

All that said, you guys advised me one way to 'Don't Blink' and miss out on your children growing up was to spend quality time with them. To be present. Well, let me tell you, I'm doing it and it's turning into a duckpin bowling obsession. You guys didn't offer advice on how to handle these situations. I feel myself slipping away.

Advice, please.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

• Yes, I know the Bengals are playing. I figured you guys were burnt out with MY Bengals ledes. My mind has been racing because road teams have dominated wild card weekend. Over the past four seasons, wild card road teams are 14-4 straight up. I'm trying not to think about it too much, but it's in my head.

That said, let's move on this morning.

• Guy G. from near Buffalo has a thrill-seeking adventure story that turned out well for him, but taught him a lesson:

I didn’t think of it yesterday, as I perused SC. Wife, son and I took a kayak trip this summer. Our usual route, one that we’ve done 50 times before. 8 miles through some decent rapids. There are 3 sections that we love, when the water is at 5’. On this day, on the 3rd day of rain, and still coming down in sheets, the water was at 7’, to crest at 8’. What a day to do it!! We dropped off the baby, and headed out.

The water didn’t crest at 8’. During our trip, we were watching the water rise. Typical streams that usually come down the cliffs were powerful waterfalls that were shooting out 50’ into the creek. On our midway stop to view this, trees were coming down the creek. We decided to press on, and were doing great…right up until the final rapid spot that we all really enjoy.

Wife got sucked to the left, and dumped her boat. Boy also left, was able to hold on, and get to the edge, and solid ground. I tried to stay right, and clear the 10’ wave that was crashing back towards me, and failed. Rolled the boat and lost it. Wife was standing on the edge, and I was able to wrangle mine over towards her, but unable to control it, and it got caught against a tree sideways. Unable to free it, we waited for a break, to be able to pull it to shore. Trees still rocketing down the creek, debris everwhere….the pressure fo the water against my boat and the tree took the tree down and sent it down the creek. Wife attempted a rescue of it, but failed. Boy and I hiked out. No phone, no keys…both wife and I worried about the other. We all made it, but will never kayak that piece of water at 7’ and rising again. 7’ and holding or receding….we’re in!!  

No photos due to lost phone in the kayak. Water was measured at 12’ at the time were leaving, rushing at 120,000 cfm of water flow. Intense!! (Wear pfd’s and helmets out there folks!)





• Daniel J. has a thrill-seeking story that went off the rails, but at least he got a good bar story out of it:

Back in 2009, as an early 20 something, I decided to do some thrill seeking by creating a fake Twitter account for a player on my favorite team, the Columbus Blue Jackets.  They had just drafted a young Russian, Nikita Filatov, in the first round who did not yet have a Twitter account.  First I created a fake Gmail account, then linked that to the fake Twitter account, added a headshot of Nikita and off I went. 

I posted a few innocuous tweets (in broken English to add authenticity) to see what would happen.  I got Mike Commodore, his teammate at the time, to believe the account was real.  On about day 3 Twitter freakin verifies the account and I started getting followed by big J news folks.  Not able to resist the opportunity I tweet out something about getting a huge offer to go play in the KHL. For the non-hockey folks, imagine your favorite NFL team spending a first round draft pick on a dude who leaves to go play in the CFL, this has been a big fear for NHL teams for years. 

After sending out the tweet about thinking of leaving for the KHL a whole firestorm erupts, my fake tweets are treated as real news, TSN is talking about it on SportsCentre, Aaron Portzline writes an article about it in the Columbus Dispatch.  Turns out none of them thought it was worthwhile to verify the news personally with Nikita until it was too late.  After the news ran through a cycle the kid caught wind of it and told reporters that he didn't even know what Twitter was and no KHL team had reached out to him.  At this point I realize that its a joke gone WAY too far so I tweet that it is a fake account and I made everything up. 

Here is a link to verify the story. http://darkbluejacket.blogspot.com/2009/09/nikitafilatov-nhl-cbj-fake-punkkids.html

That punk kid was me.

• Mike T. in Idaho sent over a question that was asked by the Wall Street Journal to its readers:

How has inflation changed your major spending plans or financial goals?

####

I'm glad the WSJ asked because I have answers. This might not sound like a major spending situation, but guys, I have been putting off building a 2X4 garage shelving unit that will go over my trash cans because of the damn lumber prices and now those prices are back up and showing zero sign of retreating. DAMMIT BIDEN!

Everyone relax, I'll end up biting the bullet on the 2X4s in the early spring.

As for financial goals, I've seen enough of the Florida retirement communities my parents live in to see my future. Hunker down -- within reason -- at this age and then strike down the road. My dad, 66, & step-mother have developed quite a setup. They live, seasonally, just over the bridge into Marco Island to prevent blowing through their retirement on real estate, but they are members at a boathouse that has their boat ready to go with one phone call and then they cruise around Marco with a cooler and stop at sandbars.

Then, on Thursdays, dad golfs with my uncle, 65, in a retiree league. Outside of that, they go to the pool (haven't requested a temp check lately, but it's typically around 90) and eat food items purchased from the Marco Farmers Market.

I'll keep pumping out Screencaps, try to keep the blood pressure in check (relax, it's not high) with the 2X4 purchase, make trips south to visit and we'll see what happens down the road.

• Jon K. wants in on the week's hottest topic -- chili!

Great work on the screencaps. First time, long time checking in from Franklin, TN. This is an oldie and all over the internet, but if you haven’t seen it, you’ll laugh very hard.

https://rtcunningham.blogspot.com/2021/09/texas-chili-cook-off.html

• Murph writes:

I'm a Cowboys fan but I'm rooting for Cincinnati this weekend also. I live about an hour from your hometown and have a lot of friends in the Dayton/Cincinnati area. 
Thought you might like this shirt.

• I think that's enough for this morning. I have two more assignments from Clay before the Bengals kick this afternoon and a Crockpot to fill up. It's going to be a crazy busy day for me and breakfast isn't even made.

May MY Bengals snap their playoff losing streak and may your road team moneyline bets hit, just not Raiders tickets.

Remember, Screencaps is now seven days a week through the Super Bowl. Make sure you have the Morning Screencaps hashtag page saved in your bookmarks so you don't miss a single day of Caps action.

Have a great day.

Email: joekinsey@gmail.com

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Written by
Joe Kinsey is the Senior Director of Content of OutKick and the editor of the Morning Screencaps column that examines a variety of stories taking place in real America. Kinsey is also the founder of OutKick’s Thursday Night Mowing League, America’s largest virtual mowing league. Kinsey graduated from University of Toledo.