You’ve heard of Pablo Escobar’s cocaine hippos and brown trout becoming meth addicts. You can add meth peanuts to the Wide World of Drugs® that continues to fascinate readers who can’t get enough of the drug trade and the craziness that comes with it. Hell, I’ll read drug indictments just to see what is revealed on secret wiretaps. Like you guys, I’m a drug story junkie who just can’t get enough.
Today we head to Memphis, Tennessee where the feds ran some packages through an x-ray machine and started to notice that boxes labeled “REGIONAL BREAD ROASTED PEANUTS REGIONAL DUST SWEET MADE OF CORN” with an origination of Mexico and an intended destination of Texas just didn’t look right. In a release, Customs and Border Protection say that there were “anomalies” with the shipment and it was time to look at these peanuts.
Authorities started cracking nuts, and looky at what was inside those peanut shells – METH NUTS!
"Anybody WANT A PEANUT!?" Andre the Giant to Wallace Shawn, The Princess Bride. @CBP Memphis Seizes 489 grams of Methamphetamine hidden in individual peanut shells. Good work by @DFONewOrleans Field Office. Read: https://t.co/kFSOg0ht5n pic.twitter.com/t0tjyEogPb
— CBP Gulf Coast (@CBPGulfCoast) July 9, 2021
“My experienced officers long ago lost all surprise at the smuggling methods they encounter every shift,” CBP official Michael Neipert said in the report. “Narcotics in fruit, nuts, baked goods, shoes, toys and all kinds of other items disguised as gifts or other legitimate shipments fly through the express consignment world. These days you can get a gram of methamphetamine at half the price of what cocaine costs, and at twice the potency. I’m proud we were able to keep this shipment from getting to its destination.”
In total, we’re talking about 489 grams of meth inside the peanut shells. CBPO estimates they prevented 2,445 doses and 15,000 hours of drug highs from hitting the streets.
Meth in peanuts isn’t the only interesting thing the CBP Gulf Coast crew has found this month. How about this fake sex honey that some Turkish entrepreneur tried to get past authorities. Don’t even try it, you thugs! These CBP guys are on top of things.
— CBP Gulf Coast (@CBPGulfCoast) July 8, 2021