Blind Balkan Mystic Baba Vanga, Dead Since 1996, Predicts 2021 Will Be Insane

If you thought 2020 was crazy, you haven't seen anything yet, according to a blind and uneducated peasant Balkan mystic named Baba Vanga who reportedly left behind yearly predictions all the way until 5079 before dying in 1996 at age 85. Why stop at 5079? That's when she predicted the universe would end.

Vanga is said to have made predictions such as America being attacked by "steel birds" and a great tsunami in 2004. That was the year a tsunami killed more than 230,000 when it hit parts of Indonesia, Sri Lanka, India and Thailand.

Now, let's get down to business here. What will 2021 bring, according to Baba Vanga? According to the Daily Mail, the dead mystic predicted "a strong dragon" will seize the world and that a cure for cancer will be developed, but it's not all great news out there. Baba also predicted "lots of cataclysms and disasters."

Here are more 2021 predictions out there that websites attribute to Baba:

• Economic fall of Europe, and an assassination attempt against the Russian President, Vladimir Putin

• President Donald Trump will become sick with a mysterious disease that will leave him deaf, and he will suffer brain trauma

• “The world will suffer from a lot of cataclysms and great disasters. The consciousness of people will change. Difficult times will come. People will be divided by their faith.”

Look, I'm just searching for a little calm in 2021. Maybe play some golf. Edge the yard on Friday afternoons after getting out of work early. Maybe crush a few brewskis with the neighbors. Take the family on a much-deserved vacation. But here's Baba Vanga predicting some dragon taking control of the world and economic destruction across Europe that would clearly have a ripple effect across North America.

I need Baba (RIP) to ramp up the positive predictions. I need her to give me hope that my Bengals will win a playoff game.

“The petrol production will stop, and the Earth will rest,” Baba Vanga is said to have predicted for 2021. Meanwhile, Elon Musk is now the second-richest person in the world.

Baba, I'm begging you, please have a prediction in your back pocket that Ohio State finally beats Clemson. PLEASE, BABA!