Anonymous Mailbag

It’s Tuesday, time for the anonymous mailbag.

But before we get rolling here, I want to ask you a question: do you have way too much credit card debt? If you do, and you own your own home, you need to contact my guy Ryan Kelley at The Home Loan Expert and let him wipe out that credit card debt you’re carrying at high interest rates and replace it with a very low interest rate mortgage. Seriously, if you have credit card debt, own a home, and are carrying that credit card debt around month to month with insanely high interest rates, it’s time to get out of the debt crunch and make a smart financial decision. Go to The HomeLoanExpert.com today and get a new mortgage.

Now it’s time for the anonymous mailbag, live from SEC Media Days.

As always, send your anonymous mailbag questions to claytravis@gmail.com, anonymity guaranteed.

“So I was invited to my friends T-Ball game the other day. Anyhow, what they forgot to tell me was that it was an All-Star game for the State Championship. My friend’s kid’s team won 25-24, it was a 5 inning game with a 5 run/inning limit. So basically there was only one inning that a team recorded three outs. And to top it all off not only did they get trophies but State Championship rings.

When they won my buddy kept calling his son a “State Champ” and was way too excited, even when the kid wasn’t around. I get being proud of your kid and all, but damn. He got pissed when I laughed at the fact that a 5-6 year old team was getting rings.

So I ask you wise gay Muslim, am I the only one that thinks it’s a bit ridiculous to not only have a T-Ball All-Star team, but to also give them rings? I feel like there shouldn’t be an All-Star team until it’s live arm kid pitching. I mean hell the kids couldn’t even field ground balls or get outs and they’re considered All-Stars. Also how ridiculous is it to give a 5-6 year old rings? I like to imagine in 15-20 years one of these kids will have it displayed somewhere and tell the story of how he won it at 5.”

Rule: If you aren’t capable of fathering a child you shouldn’t get a state championship ring. (Note: I was going to say if your fingers aren’t fully grown, but a high school freshman or sophomore deserves a state championship ring. So the general rule should be that no one gets title rings before high school).

As for the t-ball all star game, I’m fine with them existing for younger kids, but I think the idea you get rings for them is ridiculous. Also, you can’t win a state championship before kids are able to pitch to each other. That should definitely be a rule too.

It sounds like your buddy overdid it here with the celebration — what t-ball league even has a state championship level? It sounds like they may have Central Florida’d this title — but I have to be honest with you it’s hard to get the balance right when it comes to taking little league seriously enough for the kids to learn, but not seriously enough for the game to matter.

Not keeping score in really low level sports is, I think, a good idea because it sends the proper message about the game not really counting. Keeping score and saying the outcome doesn’t really matter is a contradiction because it leaves the adults and kids both confused about how seriously to take things.

I’ll give you an example from my own little league coaching experience this year: we lost a seven-eight year old boy’s baseball game because we had a baserunner called out for running outside the base path between second and third to avoid running into a shortstop who had, of course, not fielded the ball cleanly and so was chasing it around in the base path.

We were down a run, the bases were loaded, and we were scoring in the bottom half of the final inning to tie the game on the play and the bases were set to remain loaded with our best hitter coming up to bat. The odds were pretty high that we were going to win the game.

But the umpire called out our seven year old for running outside the base path on his way to third base. I think it was the wrong call — our kid was running outside the base path to avoid plowing over the shortstop in his way — but I was also thinking, how aggressively do you argue it in seven and eight year old boy’s baseball?

I mean, the call cost our team the game, but it’s seven and eight year old boy’s baseball.

So I didn’t say anything to the umpire and neither did our head coach. My thought process then was that it was better for the kids to see us accept a bad call and a defeat than to argue the call in front of them, potentially be a bad sport, and probably still lose. But I’m still not sure we did the right thing. I mean, I’m not saying I would have pulled up the base and thrown it or gone chest to chest with the umpire, but I definitely think he blew the call and I would have argued about it at most levels of sports.

Anyway, this is a long way of telling you, it’s easy to say you shouldn’t take your little kid’s games seriously, but it’s actually hard to turn off a life of being a strong competitor and caring whether your team wins and loses and suddenly have your kids play without caring who wins. I mean, the kids definitely care who wins. It counts to the; many of the kids cry after close losses. And even if you don’t keep score they are keeping score in their heads. (Often in a very wrong fashion and almost always in a way that leads to their victory.)

Having said all of that, I think grown men who celebrate their kids successes too much are compensating for the fact that their own lives haven’t been that successful. If you ever see me buying a bunch of seven year old’s state title rings, just put me out of my misery.

“I live in Houston and we have had a number of really high end restaurants like Mastro’s, Nobu, etc. open up along with some really high end lounges. Every now and then my colleagues and I will go for dinner or some drinks to those places.
Naturally, those places attract really high end clientele which in turn attract a lot of prostitutes/working girls. Those girls just stick out like a sore thumb. They are usually by themselves or in pairs with another girl that looks like a prostitute. They are at the bar by themselves. Total smoke shows. Really skimpy dress, red bottom shoes and stripper tattoos. Just screams prostitute.
My colleagues and I have been wondering amongst ourselves what their rate is for sex. I really don’t have any interest in paying for sex, but I would just like to know what they charge. Just out of curiosity. We keep talking amongst ourselves while every guy in the place stares at them.
The question I have is how do you go about approaching the these girls and asking what they charge? Do you just go up to them and ask “how much for sex?”
 
My big fear is I go up to them and ask and they happen to not be prostitutes and I get a drink thrown in my face.”
At my bachelor party there were two really hot girls on the casino floor at two in the morning and we were convinced they were prostitutes so we approached them to try and get them to put on a sex show for us. (Sidenote: don’t go to strip clubs on bachelor parties, just get girls to put on a private sex show for you. It ends up being cheaper and the girls are better looking.)
Anyway, one of my single friends ends up in a normal conversation with one of the girls and she bangs him that night.
Turns out they weren’t hookers, they were just dressed like hookers. (This confusion was in 2004. Nowadays the difference between what a normal girl wears in Vegas and what a hooker wears in Vegas is almost nonexistent. I’d bet the same is probably true at Houston clubs.)
The lesson learned there is a good one, don’t ever assume anyone is a hooker if you’re a single guy. Have a normal conversation and see where it goes. If she’s a hooker, she’s not going to have sex with you for free. But if she’s not a hooker, she might have sex with you for free.
As for what they cost, I have no idea. But is it really worth finding out what they cost if it could lead to criminal charges? Because can you imagine this defense with your wife? “Honey, I wasn’t actually going to have sex with her, I just wanted to know what she cost.”
Good luck with that argument.
At this point in time allow me to reiterate my position on prostitution — it should be legal. Every man pays for sex, paying directly for it just eliminates the hidden cost. I bet that girl would charge you way less for sex than you would spend on dinner, drinks, and entertainment to get her to sleep with you if you were actually dating.
What’s more, the entire American capitalistic society is predicated on paying people for services. If you can pay someone to fix your car, file your taxes, mow your grass, cook and prepare your meals, perform cosmetic surgery on you, and even grind on your lap naked in a strip club, why shouldn’t you be able to pay someone to have sex with you too?
I think legalizing prostitution would also make it safer for the women involved as well.
“I saw “Ant-Man and the Wasp” over the weekend, great movie with a hugely underrated Marvel character. However, there was a huge distraction that occurred throughout the movie. A couple came to see the movie with their baby, and this wasn’t the quiet kind. The baby was fussing so much the father had to leave the theatre twice. It didn’t ruin the movie, but hearing that child throughout was just ridiculous. How big of a dick move is it to bring a baby to a movie theater? This isn’t a plane where you’re trapped and have nowhere to go, you chose to come here and ruin everybody’s night because you couldn’t find a babysitter. Andfor what? So you can ruin the movie for yourself sitting there thinking “please don’t cry, please don’t cry”. Love the show, congrats on the radio extension.”
I totally understand why some moms — and dads — would want to bring their babies to matinee movies.
You’re going insane and stir crazy around the house and you know that your baby is going to sleep at certain hours so why not go see a movie during the middle of the week and during the middle of a day? I see nothing wrong with that so long as you understand that if the baby starts to cry you have to leave the theater.
I do think it’s too much to do that on a weekend though.
I totally get a couple wanting to go see a movie together, but unless your baby always sleeps for several hours and never makes a sound, this is a bad move. And even if that’s true about your baby’s sleep patterns, kids are unpredictable. We never took a baby to a movie or even thought about doing so for this exact reason.
Now we do bring our three year old to movies and he talks throughout the entire movie, but I think that’s par for the course when it comes to kid movies. Kid movies sometimes sound like concerts, the entire theater is all talking together with a ton of parents trying, and failing, to quiet down all the kids.

“I was recently in the Philippines and was wearing my Outkick t-shirt. You will be happy to know it was recognized and commented on multiple times.  You are truly going global!

In the Philippines, and other Asian countries such as Thailand, you will see these old retired dudes with 20-30 year-old local girls all over the place.  I find it creepy, but understand it from a rational standpoint.  The girl is looking for economic security and the guy wants a hot young woman with whom to have sex and often procreate.

When I talked to some of these guys, I would often get the same story: “I made my money in the States (or Australia, UK, whatever) and western women are bitches.  I can live like a king here and fuck as many women as I want.”

I see this as a reflection of what is happening in the States.  Most of the married men I know are either unhappy or just trudging through raising kids with a hectoring wife.  A lot of single guys I know have either dropped out of the dating pool all together or just sportfuck morally-challenged women.

Society’s response seems to be that we are just losers.  However, we are all moderate to high income, successful men in our 40’s who have slept with dozens of women and have no trouble getting laid. We are no longer willing to put up with all that comes with dating the average woman and would much rather watch sports, travel, and hang out with our guy friends.

So finally to the question: Do you think there is a point where it is no longer rational to date women for a man in his 40’s/50’s (most younger men will want kids and thus should be in a relationship)?  And if so, what are the downstream consequences of this phenomenon?

Footnote: Since I have started telling people I no longer date, a lot more women want to date me.”

To me the number one reason to get married is to have kids. I don’t believe any single parent should ever intentionally raise a kid alone because I believe it takes two people to raise a kid and do a decent job of it. (There may be a limited exception here for single people who are so wealthy they can hire full time help. For instance, if you have enough money to hire a great nanny who is with your kid all the time while you work, is the kid just as well off as having two parents? Probably not quite, but it’s close. The same could also be true if you have grandparents that live in your house or some similar living situation where you have the help of other adults with raising your kid. )

The most important thing the vast majority of us will do with our lives is raise our kids. So finding the right person to raise kids with in my opinion is the single most important decision most of us will make in our lives.

The second most valuable reason to get married is to have another person who, at least in theory, is a partner to help you make difficult decisions in your life. My wife is my number one sounding board for any major decision I have to make. And I think as a result of being married to her I have made better decisions than if I’d stayed single or if I’d married a total bimbo just for sex.

I’m honestly not sure there is a third reason to get married. That includes being in love, which is, I think, probably the worst reason to get married. You can be in love with someone and not need to marry them and pledge away half your assets for the rest of your life. Yes, you want to be in love with the person you’re marrying, but I think that’s primarily important for both number one and two above. If you aren’t in love with your partner it makes it hard for you to be a good parent and I don’t think you’ll trust the opinion of someone you don’t love and respect.

So in my opinion love is a necessary ingredient to fulfill the two reasons you get married, but I don’t think love alone requires marriage.

I mean, I understand the idea of wanting companionship, but if you aren’t having kids and you aren’t marrying someone whose opinion you value on a deep level, you should have plenty of friends to spend time with. You should also have plenty of sex partners.

Your contemplated situation has nothing to do with either of my conditions for marriage, so I don’t see it as an issue here. If you’re divorced, already have a family, and are primarily interested in having sex with a high volume of young, attractive women, why wouldn’t you do what these guys do?

Now I have to believe that like anything eventually you get tired of having sex with young, attractive women just like you’d get tired of anything if you did it too much, but it doesn’t sound awful to test this hypothesis.

As Charlie Sheen famously said after the Heidi Fleiss scandal when he was asked why someone like him — young, rich, and good looking — would be paying for prostitutes: “I don’t pay them for sex, I pay them to leave.”

“My wife is pregnant with our first kid (boy) and is due this Labor Day. We haven’t settled on a name yet, but we were considering the name Landon. I played soccer in high school so I figured it was a bonus that it was also the name of one of the best soccer players in American history if he wanted to play soccer as well. Now, this was before Landon Donovan ridiculously came out in support of Mexico for this years World Cup and I definitely don’t see him the same way I did before. We really like the name, but the question is can we stick with it in spite of the idiotic statements Donovan has made?”

I think it’s a bad idea to pick a baby’s name based on anyone who is currently living unless that person is in your family. (I think family names are great; you just have to hope the person you name your kids after doesn’t turn into a serial killer after the baby is born).

So if you like the name Landon, I’d stick with it. I don’t think most people are going to assume you named your kid after Landon Donovan because, honestly, I don’t think he’s that famous. I mean, Michael Jordan is infinitely more famous than Landon Donovan and there are thousands and thousands of guys and girls named Jordan and I don’t think most of them got their names because of Michael Jordan.

In general, however, I’d just be careful naming your son or daughter after a famous athlete.

For instance, don’t you bet there are some guys out there who convinced their wives to name their kids after O.J. Simpson? How about Lance Armstrong? All humans are flawed and I believe that humans in their twenties and thirties are the most flawed.

So be careful naming your kids after someone that young. You have no idea how the rest of their lives will turn out.

Send your anonymous mailbag questions to claytravis@gmail.com, anonymity guaranteed.

Written by Clay Travis

OutKick founder, host and author. He's presently banned from appearing on both CNN and ESPN because he’s too honest for both.