LSU-Alabama CBS Drinking Game: 2012 Edition

The CBS drinking game is back.

I know, I know, I've been lax in setting up the games this season. There should have been a drinking game for the big game doubleheader, LSU at Florida and Georgia at South Carolina. And I should have had a drinking game last weekend for the Cocktail Party and...basically I've failed all of you.

I apologize.

As we embark upon the first #cbsdrink of 2012, it's important to know that our game has become so popular that everyone on the telecast is aware of the games. In fact, go to Google right now and type in Verne Lundquist. The third Google autocomplete? Our drinking game. The OKTC crew is a powerful and mischevious lot.

I'll also be at the game, in the press box, which means I won't hear the audio broadcast. So you guys have to be my eyes and ears. This means I need as many of you as possible to be playing along at the hashtag #cbsdrink.

I feel pretty confident that we can make the hashtag trend nationally at some point during the game.

As if you aren't hyped enough for this game, watch this.

Now let's drink.  

1. Every time the camera catches Les Miles in an awkward hand clap, drink.

This is a strong one to start with, in fact, if CBS really wanted to, they could make you drunk just off this rule.

If you aren't familiar with the Les Miles hand clap, here it is:

2. Whenever Uncle Verne Lundquist misidentifies a player, team, or mistakes a clear incomplete pass for a completion or basically makes an unbelieveable announcing error, drink.

Good luck with this one.

Uncle Verne!

3. Every time there is a highlight from either the BCS title game or last year's game in Tuscaloosa, drink.

I know, I know, we're starting really strong. Pace yourselves.

4. Les Miles and Nick Saban are tied at 3-3 since Saban came to Alabama.

Drink when this is mentioned.

If the phrase "rubber match," or "game seven" is used, finish your beer.

5. Every time the Honey Badger is mentioned, drink. 

If the Honey Badger is shown in the crowd, do a shot.

If the Honey Badger is shown in the crowd smoking a joint, Twitter will explode, ending the drinking game for all of us.

6. Every time Gary Danielson grimaces and points out an open receiver that Zach Mettenberger missed, drink. 

If Danielson telestrates a missed Mettenberger touchdown, finish your beer. (This is 100% guaranteed to happen).   

7.  When Uncle Verne chortles, drink. 

If he chortles after saying, "Oh. My. Goodness." you have to finish your drink.

If you don't know what the Uncle Verne chortle is, reconsider several elements of your life. 

And here's a video.

8. Is LSU punter Brad Wing from Australia?

I'm not sure.

But drink every time this is mentioned.

If Uncle Verne does an Aussie accent, finish your beer.

9. AJ McCarron has not thrown an interception since 1974.

Every time it is mentioned that he doesn't throw interceptions, drink.

10. Uncle Verne loves to exaggerate French accents when LSU is playing. 

Every time Uncle Verne exaggerates a French accent, drink. 

(Note: this will happen for sure every time Drew Allemon kicks).  

11. Whenever the CBS cameras catch hot coeds in the crowd and you pause your DVR to look at them, drink.  

If the men beside them have inevitably outkicked their coverage, drink anew.   

12. Pre or postgame challenge: drink the entire time Tracy Wolfson interviews Les Miles on the sideline.

It's almost impossible to not spit-take based on something Miles says.

See if you can drink through the entire interview without laughing.

13. Nick Saban will not smile throughout the entire game.

But if the camera catches him smiling, finish your beer.

If Saban has gatorade poured on him and chokes a player to death on the sideline, rejoice that the trial will be in Louisiana instead of Alabama, where Saban would be freed without trial.

14. If Tracy Wolfson uses the word multiplicity while interviewing Les Miles, do a shot.

I'm going to try and set this one up.

You've got to do it, Tracy, got to.

15. If AJ McCarron's hot mom is mentioned for any reason, drink.

If Verne or Gary say, "I'm not sure whether AJ deserves the Heisman, but I think his mom deserves two," then we're finished here.

Just go ahead and pass out.

Hopefully dreaming of this.


I'm open to adding any rules that y'all suggest between now and gametime. So post them below.

But, remember, drink along with your Internet friends on Twitter at #cbsdrink

Written by
Clay Travis is the founder of the fastest growing national multimedia platform, OutKick, that produces and distributes engaging content across sports and pop culture to millions of fans across the country. OutKick was created by Travis in 2011 and sold to the Fox Corporation in 2021. One of the most electrifying and outspoken personalities in the industry, Travis hosts OutKick The Show where he provides his unfiltered opinion on the most compelling headlines throughout sports, culture, and politics. He also makes regular appearances on FOX News Media as a contributor providing analysis on a variety of subjects ranging from sports news to the cultural landscape. Throughout the college football season, Travis is on Big Noon Kickoff for Fox Sports breaking down the game and the latest storylines. Additionally, Travis serves as a co-host of The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show, a three-hour conservative radio talk program syndicated across Premiere Networks radio stations nationwide. Previously, he launched OutKick The Coverage on Fox Sports Radio that included interviews and listener interactions and was on Fox Sports Bet for four years. Additionally, Travis started an iHeartRadio Original Podcast called Wins & Losses that featured in-depth conversations with the biggest names in sports. Travis is a graduate of George Washington University as well as Vanderbilt Law School. Based in Nashville, he is the author of Dixieland Delight, On Rocky Top, and Republicans Buy Sneakers Too.