16 reasons you should be watching the Champions League

I know, I feel it too. It’s the warm fuzzy you get when football’s back. There’s nothing better than curling up on the coach with a loved one, wasting your Tuesday afternoon away with some of the best footballers in the world. Wait, what? That’s right, it’s Champions League season again, suckas. Here’s why you should tune in:

  1. Christiano Ronaldo’s handbag game has never been stronger.

  2. So you know who to hate when the World Cup rolls around in three years or whatever.

  3. Luiz Suarez might bite another dude.

  4. Because they don’t have a domestic abuse problem. Except for this.

  5. Because the people who run soccer aren’t racist. Except for this.

  6. Because their players aren’t on performance enhancing drugs. Actually that’s mostly true.

  7. Very low chance of getting in a giant brawl. Unless you’re watching this team. Or those teams.

  8. Almost no chance of seeing a beheading.

  9. You could see goals like this.

  10. Also very good goalkeeping.

  11. Streakers! Weeeee!!!

  12. It’s the only thing on TV worth watching at the Phoenix airport bar at 2pm on a Tuesday.

  13. Your internet privileges got taken away after your parents found out you were the source of the Fappening.

  14. One word, which is actually three words: WAGs.

  15. You have 2 hours to kill until your next Candy Crush life is available.

You like sports that are really American.

Written by Clay Travis

OutKick founder, host and author. He's presently banned from appearing on both CNN and ESPN because he’s too honest for both.

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