15 Types Of College Football Status Updates on Facebook

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(originally published 9/13/12)

My Facebook news feed is good for two things:

1)   Arguments about politics.

2)   Arguments about college football.

I expect Facebook to explode with so much Obama and Alabama hyperbole that the two eventually become one. Obamabama?

Anyway, to help my fellow college football fans, I thought I’d make a quick list of the types of Facebook status updates you can look for during the season. If you see one of these status updates, your best bet is to just leave it alone:

The Braggard

Sideline passes at LSU-Bama, bro. Check it.  

The Punk

Florida 56, Kent State 10. Suck it, Kent State. Suck it hard! Bahaha!

The Inquisitor

Seriously? What is wrong with Aaron Murray? Dude? Who are you throwing the ball to? 

The Sorority Girl

Go Maryland! Beat the Wolfpack! Yay!

The Coach Hater

I’m so freaking tired of only winning 12 games a season. Say it with me Tiger Nation, Miles has got to go!

The Cheesy One-Liner Guy

It’s not UGA. It’s UGaly! Hahaha!

The Antagonizer

89% of LSU’s wide receivers have been arrested, suspended, or charged with illegally trafficking greyhounds since 2005. Just sayin’.

The Post-Game Partier

Doing it up right with my KA bros in Oxford tonight, baby!

Mr. Positive

Tough loss, Yellow Jacket Nation. But the boys looked spirited today! I like where Coach Johnson is taking the program. Let’s take care of business versus Ohio in the Potato Bowl! 

The Live Play-By-Player

Marshall up the middle for 2. 2nd and 8 on 43. Georgia 3 Tennessee 0.

The Check-In Guy

Joe Jones just checked in at Vaught-Hemingway stadium for Ole Miss vs. Central Arkansas.

The Depressed Guy

I hate this. I really hate this. Why. Can’t. We. Ever. Beat. Texas.  

The Illiterate

Roll Tide!!!! If you like ALL BARN, thn your gay!!! Raymer Jamer Alabamer!

Mr. Sarcasm

Good to see Auburn stayed below the salary cap this year. LOL.

The “Insider”

Talked to Coach Bobo last week. Watch this. Sprint draw left on next play.

So you’ve probably seen one or two or 15 posts like this on Facebook. If not, you should know they’re coming. They’re out there in your news feed, just waiting to be liked, commented on, and shared.

But even if you see that the Coach Hater’s post has 38 comments and 14 likes, just keep walking right on by. Or, maybe you can do a little good and like the sad little status update of the guy who didn’t receive any love for his check in at Vaught Hemingway.

That’s it! Maybe, just maybe, this college football season, we can all vow to be social media saints, spreading likes, shares and happy comments everywhere!

No, on second thought, screw it.

Go Dawgs!!! 


Robert Bruce is a full-time writer for Dave Ramsey, a die-hard Georgia fan, and a part-time blogger at 101books.net. Follow him on Twitter: @robertbruce76


Written by Clay Travis

Clay Travis is the founder of the fastest growing national multimedia platform, OutKick, that produces and distributes engaging content across sports and pop culture to millions of fans across the country. OutKick was created by Travis in 2011 and sold to the Fox Corporation in 2021.

One of the most electrifying and outspoken personalities in the industry, Travis hosts OutKick The Show where he provides his unfiltered opinion on the most compelling headlines throughout sports, culture, and politics. He also makes regular appearances on FOX News Media as a contributor providing analysis on a variety of subjects ranging from sports news to the cultural landscape.

Additionally, Travis serves as a co-host of The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show, a three-hour conservative radio talk program syndicated across Premiere Networks radio stations nationwide.

Previously, he launched OutKick The Coverage on Fox Sports Radio that included interviews and listener interactions, and started an iHeartRadio Original Podcast called Wins & Losses that featured in-depth conversations with the biggest names in sports.

Travis is a graduate of George Washington University as well as Vanderbilt Law School. Based in Nashville, he is the author of Dixieland Delight, On Rocky Top, and Republicans Buy Sneakers.